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COBOL /koh'bol/ n.
[COmmon Business-Oriented Language]
(Synonymous with evil.) A weak, verbose, and flabby language
used by card wallopers to do boring mindless things on
dinosaur mainframes. Hackers believe that all COBOL
programmers are suits or code grinders, and no
self-respecting hacker will ever admit to having learned the
language. Its very name is seldom uttered without ritual
expressions of disgust or horror. One popular one is Edsger W.
Dijkstra's famous observation that "The use of COBOL cripples the
mind; its teaching should, therefore, be regarded as a criminal
offense." (from "Selected Writings on Computing: A Personal
Perspective") See also fear and loathing, software rot.
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