Tales of Ono Balono #4 - The Circus

This a tale of Ono Balono, The Master of Wit and Repartie.

One day, on his way home, John noticed a poster announcing that there was a circus coming to town. John was ecstatic, he loved the circus. He liked the lions, the tigers and the trapeeze and especially the clowns. John loved the clowns.

John walked straight to ticket office, where the cirus was setting up, and bought front row seats for each of the three nights the circus was in town. The first show night was the next day, and everyone John met he told how excited he was. He enthusiasm for the lions, the tigers and the trapeeze was obvious, but when he spoke about the clowns and their antics it was obvious that John loved the clowns.

John managed not to explode with excitment and eventually took up his front row seat at the opening night.

The lions were fantastic, the tigers roared and thrilled and the trapeeze artists seemed to fly through the air.

The clowns arrived and John was in tears because he laughed so much at their antics, the silly costumes with big feet, the car that fell apart and the mess and pies in the face. As the clown's act was comming to a close a new clown enetered the ring, one with a huge red nose. Spotlights played over the crowd and slowly, one by one they stoped on John. As the last one stopped a murmur went round the crown, and as the clown with the big red nose approached the audience became silent.

"Are you the front end of an ass?" The clown asked John.
"No!" came the reply.
"Are you the rear end of an ass?" The clown probed further.
"No?" Said John.
"Then, ladies and gentlemen," said the clown turning to the audience, "you must be no end of and ass".

The audience thought this was hilarious. John was very upset and left the circus in tears.

As he was walking home Dave, his friend, spotted him crying. Dave asked what was wrong.

John explained about the circus and how much he liked it, especially the clowns. He said that tonight's performance had been great, until the end. He told Dave about the lions, the tigers, the trapeeze artists and, John's favourite, the clowns.

John then told Dave about the incident with the clown with the big red nose, about how he had asked if John was the front end of and ass, the back end of an ass and had tricked him. He told about the soul shattering moment when everyone had laughed at John for being no end of an ass.

"You should see Ono Balono, The Master of Wit and Repartie," said Dave.
"Oh, he's a very important and busy man, I wouldn't want to trouble him,"replied John.

Besides, John thought, tommorrow would be someone else's turn and he cheered up as he began looking forward to the next days performance.

The next day, John took his seat. The lions were fantastic, the tigers roared and thrilled and the trapeeze artists seemed to fly through the air.

The clowns arrived and John laughed their antics, the silly costumes with big feet, the car that fell apart and the mess and pies in the face. Once again, as the clown's act was comming to a close a new clown enetered the ring, the one with the huge red nose. Spotlights played over the crowd and slowly, to John's horror, one by one they stoped on him. As the last one stopped a murmur went round the crownd, the big red nose'd clown approached.

"Are you the front end of an ass?" The clown asked John.
"No," trembled John.
"Are you the rear end of an ass?" The clown probed further.
"No," he sobbed, as his mind froze.
"Then, ladies and gentlemen," said the clown turning to the audience, "you must be no end of and ass".

On his way home, again in tears, Dave spotted him and asked if the same had happened again. John sobbed out the story and Dave took him to see Ono Balono, The Master of Wit and Repartie.

Dave knocked at the door, and with reverence John enetered the home of Ono Balono, The Master of Wit and Repartie. John explained his problem and after several moments Ono Balono spoke.

"I will come with you to the final performance" he announced.

On the last night, John took his seat, reassured that next to him was Ono Balone, The Master of Wit and Repartie. The lions were fantastic, the tigers roared and thrilled and the trapeeze artists seemed to fly through the air.

The clowns arrived and John laughed their antics. Again, as the clown's act was comming to a close a the clown with the big red nose enetered the ring. Spotlights played over the crowd and slowly, one by one they stoped on John.

The clown with the big red nose apporoached with an evil grin on his face.

"Are you the front end of an ass?" The clown asked John.

John looked at Ono Balono and he nodded for John to continue

"No."

"Are you the rear end of an ass?" The clown sneered.

Again John looked to Ono Balono and again he was encouraged to continue

"No."

Before the clown could reply Ono Balono, The Master of Wit and Repartie, stood. The crowd strained to here the wisdom of The Master, everyone knew of his magnificent wit and repartie.

Ono Balono very slowly extended a finger to point at the clown and slowly, carefully and quietly spoke the words.

"***** off big nose!"


oooOOOooo

Very, very sory folks, but some one asked me to tell a joke!