Help! VIRUS!!!
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Thread: Help! VIRUS!!!

  1. #1
    Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2001
    Posts
    90

    Unhappy Help! VIRUS!!!

    Not cool.. I'm coming down with a bronchial cough.. my lungs are.. messed up as it is.. so it is not very fun.. How do I kill the virus? I mean.. do I have to eat some anti-virus software? Seriously.. science has proven that the human body is actually a computer, comprised of hardware AND software.. that's where medicine comes in.. certain medicines.. reprogram your system to do something else.. Well.. I need some hints.. my universal cure is Chinese food.. but... I am broke.. so.. it looks like I'm gonna be sprinkling cinnamon on my tortias*...

    *refer to "Recipes" post

    (Virus)
    ~zѰFF~

    Elen sila lumenn omentielvo..
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  2. #2
    Senior Member
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    Aug 2001
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    Well, chicken noodle soup works for me. But the best thing is a home-made remedy that I came up with all by myself! Here's the recipe:

    3 tsp. tomato ketchup
    4 tbsp. honey
    3 oz. milk
    4 oz. orange juice
    1 medium piece of parsely
    3.5 cups water
    1.5 cups chopped almonds
    3 mint leaves
    2 tsp. vanilla extract (or imitation)
    4 cups flour
    4 tbsp. powdered sugar

    Mix all the ingredients in a blender. Blend until no chunks remain. Pour into large pan, so that it is about 1.5" deep. Bake (convection bake is even better) at 350 degrees F. Remove from oven and allow to cool for 15 minutes. Refrigerate for one hour. Remove from refrigerator and serve immediately. (To whoever you wish, but I would never really eat this). After the damage is done, heat up a bowl of Campbell's Chicken Noodle Soup. Consume hastily, and head to bed. Sleep for 8.25 hours. Repeat as needed.

    I hope this has helped some. I wish you the best of luck in your endeavour to GET WELL SOON! For whatever you may think its worth, I'll be praying for you.

    God bless.

    **DISCLAIMER-- PhirePhreak makes no guarantee of the effectiveness of the above instructions. Do not use the above instructions for illegal or immoral purposes. If you use the above instructions, PhirePhreak is not held in any way responsible for your actions, injuries, death, and what have you. And don't forget, friendship is like a barrel of monkeys.**
    I know you\'re out there. I can feel you now. I know that you\'re afraid. You\'re afraid of us. You\'re afraid of change. I don\'t know the future. I didn\'t come here to tell you how this is going to end. I came here to tell you how it\'s going to begin. I\'m going to hang up this phone, and then I\'m going to show these people what you don\'t want them to see. I\'m going to show them a world without you, a world without rules and controls, without borders or boundaries. A world where anything is possible. Where we go from there is a choice I leave to you.
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  3. #3
    That sounds nasty as hell, I wouldn't want to even smell that crap. But try this

    Hey just go to the store, get some Vick's vapor rub, sleeping pills, and nasal decongestient. Mix it all together and eat as much as you can. Once you get to the hospital you will get your stomach pumped and ask for a **** load of morphine. Repeat until feeling better. lol.
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  4. #4
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    Oct 2001
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    90

    Smile Hehe..

    Um... I think I'll just order the Chinese food...
    ~zѰFF~

    Elen sila lumenn omentielvo..
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  5. #5
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2001
    Posts
    503
    It's the thought that counts, right?

    Get Well Soon!

    I know you\'re out there. I can feel you now. I know that you\'re afraid. You\'re afraid of us. You\'re afraid of change. I don\'t know the future. I didn\'t come here to tell you how this is going to end. I came here to tell you how it\'s going to begin. I\'m going to hang up this phone, and then I\'m going to show these people what you don\'t want them to see. I\'m going to show them a world without you, a world without rules and controls, without borders or boundaries. A world where anything is possible. Where we go from there is a choice I leave to you.
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  6. #6
    Senior Member
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    Jul 2001
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    USA
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    moonshine and lots of it!!!!!
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  7. #7
    Junior Member
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    Oct 2001
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    Take 2 ibuprofin, wash it down with a beer, get some sleep.
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  8. #8
    Member
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    Aug 2001
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    56
    You can't go wrong chasing nyquil with some sort of hard alcohol....may or may not cure you , but you wont be awake to care
    Ignorance is a voluntary misfortune
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  9. #9
    Token drunken Irish guy
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    Sep 2001
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    Are you trying to get drunk or cured or both?
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  10. #10
    Junior Member
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    Oct 2001
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    27
    Go for both
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