Top Eight Morons of 2001
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Thread: Top Eight Morons of 2001

  1. #1
    Senior Member
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    Talking Top Eight Morons of 2001

    recieved by email so no credit for the source.

    Enjoy anyway!


    1. AT&T fired President John Walter after nine months, saying he lacked
    intellectual leadership. He received a $26 million severance package.
    Perhaps it's not Walter who's lacking intelligence.

    2. Police in Oakland, California spent two hours attempting to subdue a
    gunman who had barricaded himself inside his home. After firing 10 tear
    gas canisters, officers discovered that the man was standing beside them
    in the police line, shouting "Please come out and give yourself up."

    3. An Illinois man, pretending to have a gun, kidnapped a motorist and
    forced him to drive to two different automated teller machines, wherein
    the kidnapper proceeded to withdraw money from his own bank accounts.

    4. A man walked into a Topeka, Kan., Kwik Stop, and asked for all the
    money in the cash drawer. Apparently, the take was too small, so he tied
    up the store clerk and worked the counter himself for three hours until
    police showed up and grabbed him.

    5. Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a robbery suspect who just
    couldn't control himself during a lineup. When detectives asked each man
    in the lineup to repeat the words, "Give me all your money or I'll
    shoot," the man shouted, "That's not what I said!"

    6. A man spoke frantically into the phone, "My wife is pregnant and her
    contractions are only two minutes apart!" "Is this her first child?" the
    doctor asked. "No!" the man shouted, "This is her husband!"

    7. In Modesto, Calif., Steven Richard King was arrested for trying to
    hold up a Bank of America branch without a weapon. King used a thumb and
    a finger to simulate a gun, but unfortunately, he failed to keep his
    hand in his pocket.

    8. During the early summer of 1995, on Lake Mousam, located in Maine, an
    hour northeast of Portsmouth, some folks, new to boating, were having a
    problem. No matter how hard they tried; they couldn't get their brand
    new 22-foot boat going. It was very sluggish in almost every maneuver,
    no matter how much power was applied. After about an hour of trying to
    make it go, they putted to a nearby marina, thinking someone there could
    tell them what was wrong. A thorough topside check revealed everything
    in perfect working condition. The engine ran fine, the out drive went up
    and down, and the prop was the correct size and pitch. Finally, one of
    the marina guys jumped in the water to check underneath. He came up
    choking on water, he was laughing so hard. Under the boat, still
    strapped securely in place, was the trailer.

  2. #2
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    Smile

    hee hee .... nice shots man ...
    When the power of Love overcomes the Love of power, the world will know peace... Jimi Hendrix
    -------------------------------------------------------------
    I dream of giving birth to a child who will ask...... what was war?

  3. #3
    Token drunken Irish guy
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    Hehe good stuff!

  4. #4
    ROFL good one

  5. #5
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    nice.
    Trappedagainbyperfectlogic.

  6. #6
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    Funny.... #6 could been me when my first kid was born.

  7. #7
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    rofl that was some good stuff keep it up!

  8. #8
    AntiOnline Senior Member souleman's Avatar
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    Can I be number 9? Or maybe my boss.

    If you wonder why I say that, ask around in irc.antionline.com. They know the story.
    \"Ignorance is bliss....
    but only for your enemy\"
    -- souleman

  9. #9
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    I've heard the one about the robber working the till before.. that's hilarious!

    SSJVegeta-Sei


    Pierce me with steel, rend me with claw and fang; as I die, a legend is born for another generation to follow.
    An\' it harm none, do as ye will. - Wiccan Rede

  10. #10
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    killer one dude

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