windoze "smart" file extensions & mouse balls
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Thread: windoze "smart" file extensions & mouse balls

  1. #1
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    windoze "smart" file extensions & mouse balls

    some computer related humor


    windoze "smart" file extensions

    In order to reduce the amount of confusion that end users might have in identifying the role of certain files that they have on their hard drives, Windows now incorporates "smart" file extensions to aid end users in support and troubleshooting issues. Please consult this reference guide before calling Microsoft or any authorized Microsoft Support Services vendor.

    .god - Files developed by microsoft
    .crap - 3rd party files
    .porn - Adult image files on an umarried males computer
    .bible - Adult image files on a married males computer
    .easyaccess - Undocumented security flaws in Explorer, Outlook, and IIS
    .forsakendreams - Unfinished novels and short stories
    .lewinsky - Letters to your mistress
    .jackson - Information files on your illegitimate children
    .bush - New compression format that give you 1.6 Trillion times more disk space but may increase the amount of arsenic and CO that your computer produces
    .china - Files that will hold 24 other files hostage if any attempts are made to reference the operating system.
    .greenspan - New products that attempt to prevent overuse of the computer by dynamically adjusting the amount of memory your computer has available (adjusted quarterly).
    -----------------------------

    mouse balls are fru's

    Mouse balls are now available as a FRU (Field Replacement Unit). Therefore, if a mouse fails to operate or should it perform erratically, it may need a ball replacement. Because of the delicate nature of this procedure, replacement of mouse balls should only be attempted by properly trained personnel. Before proceeding, determine the type of mouse balls by examining the underside of the mouse. Domestic balls will be larger and harder than foreign balls. Ball removal procedures differ depending upon the manufacturer of the mouse. Foreign balls can be replaced using the pop-off method. Domestic balls are replaced by using the twist-off method. Mouse balls are not usually static sensitive. However, excessive handling can result in sudden discharge. Upon completion of ball replacement, the mouse may be used immediately. It is recommended that each replacer have a pair of spare balls for maintaining optimum customer satisfaction. Any customer missing his ball should suspect local personnel of removing these necessary items."

  2. #2
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    Talking

    .virusattracting - anything to do with IIS
    .annoying - windoze startup/shutdown logos
    .ugly - Bill Gates pics
    .monopoly - M$ files created after win98

    \"Welcome to the real world...it sucks. Your gunna love it.\'\"

  3. #3
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    .trojan - a windows trojan
    .mac - WILL NOT RUN ON WINDOWS U IDIOT SO STOP ASKING
    .scr - not always a screen saver and tends to be a virus so quit falling for it
    .scriptkiddy - hacking toolz
    .binladen - pictures of males haveing sex with camels and sand monkeys
    .j00 - self pictures
    .schoolwork - pictures ur daughter took on her webcam to send to old horny men
    .officework - pictures u took of urself to send to old horny men u thought were women
    .real - spy ware
    .microsoft - a sploit just waiting to be found

    quick ones i made up while bored and thinking this topic was funny : )

    _NetSyN_
    [shadow]i have a herd of 1337 sheep[/shadow]
    Worth should be judged on quality... Not apperance... Anyone can sell you **** inside a pretty box.. The only real gift then is the box..

  4. #4
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    .schoolwork - pictures ur daughter took on her webcam to send to old horny men
    .officework - pictures u took of urself to send to old horny men u thought were women
    LOL.. how many of these do you have on your box , NetSyn ?

  5. #5
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    872
    .lsd - what you need to be on to buy another Windows machine
    .cpu - what you need to get away from at 2:14AM
    .linux - what everybody bloody needs
    .unix - what everybody bloody wants
    .1337 - 'upper classmen' of file extensions...
    ...This Space For Rent.

    -[WebCarnage]

  6. #6
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    .cool - annything that isnt .suck
    .suck - anything that isnt .cool
    .bored - replies to threads when bored
    .neverthoughtidseeithappen - files co-created by the U.S. Gov. and CDC
    .banned - f00s who piss off the powers that be
    .sleepy - the last file looked at before powering down monitor
    \"Welcome to the real world...it sucks. Your gunna love it.\'\"

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