Kids Say The Darnest Things
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Thread: Kids Say The Darnest Things

  1. #1
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2002

    Kids Say The Darnest Things

    Rember that show ? Bill C. does a version of it now and its a laugh a minute

    I found a website with some funny little things for humor bout kids, feel free to read

    A little girl, dressed in her Sunday best, was running as
    fast as she could, trying not to be late for Bible class.
    As she ran she prayed, "Dear Lord, please don't let
    me be late! Dear Lord, please don't let me be late!" As
    she was running and praying, she tripped on a curb and
    fell, getting her clothes dirty and tearing her dress. She
    got up, brushed herself off, and started running again. As
    she ran she once again began to pray, "Dear Lord,
    please don't let me be late... But please don't shove me


    A little girl became restless as the preacher's
    sermon dragged on and on. Finally, she leaned over to her
    mother and whispered, "Mommy, if we give him the money
    now, will ! he let us go?"


    A little boy was overheard praying: "Lord,
    if You can't make me a better boy, don't worry about it. I'm
    having a real good time like I am!"


    Three boys are in the schoolyard bragging about
    their fathers. The first boy says, "My Dad scribbles
    a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a poem, they
    give him $50." The second boy
    says, "That's nothing. My Dad scribbles a few words on a
    piece of paper, he calls it a song, they give him $100."
    The third boy says, &! quotI got you both
    beat. My Dad scribbles a few words on a
    piece of paper, he calls it a sermon. And it takes eight people to
    collect all the money!"


    Adam and Eve had an ideal marriage. He didn't
    have to hear about all the men she could have married, and she
    didn't have to hear about the way his mother cooked.


    An elderly woman died last month. Having never
    married, she requested no male pallbearers.
    In her handwritten instructions for her memorial service,
    she wrote, "They wouldn't take me out while I was alive,
    I don't want them to take me out when I'm dead.


    A police recruit was asked during the
    exam, What would you do if you had to arrest your
    own mother?" He said, "Call for backup."


    A Sunday school teacher asked the children just
    before she dismissed them to go to church, "And why is
    it necessary to be quiet in church?" Annie replied,
    "Because people are sleeping."


    A Sunday School teacher asked her class
    why Joseph and Mary took Jesus with them to Jerusalem. A
    small child replied: "They couldn't get a baby sitter."


    A Sunday school teacher was
    discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year
    olds. After explaining the commandment to "honor thy
    father and thy mother," she asked Is there a
    commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and
    sisters?" Without missing a beat one little boy
    answered, "Thou shall not kill."


    At Sunday School they were teaching ! how
    God created everything including human beings. Little
    Johnny seemed especially intent when they told him how Eve
    was created out of one of Adam's ribs. Later in the
    week his mother noticed him lying down as though he were
    ill, and said, Johnny what is the matter? Little Johnny
    responded, "I have pain in my side. I think I'm going
    to have a wife."

    [shadow]i have a herd of 1337 sheep[/shadow]
    Worth should be judged on quality... Not apperance... Anyone can sell you **** inside a pretty box.. The only real gift then is the box..

  2. #2
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2002
    lol thats some funny $..t
    By the sacred **** of the sacred psychedelic tibetan yeti ....We\'ll smoke the chinese out
    The 20th century pharoes have the slaves demanding work

  3. #3
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2002
    Ahh...that was a great show, along with his other shows. The come on at Nick at Nite. His shows are funny. I like the Cosby Show, and Kids Say the Darndest Things.
    [gloworange]Die, or surrender, either way won\'t work.[/gloworange]

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