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June 21st, 2002, 07:21 PM
#1
Member
windows jokes
WINDERS 98
MICROSOFT NEWS RELEASE:
It has come to our attention that a few copies of the Georgia edition of Windows 98 may have accidentally been shipped outside Georgia. If you have one of the Georgia editions you may need some help understanding the commands.
The Georgia edition may be recognized by looking at the opening screen.
It reads WINDERS 98 with a background picture of the General Lee super imposed on a Confederate flag. It is shipped with a Daisy Duke screen saver.
Also note:
Recycle Bin is labeled Outhouse
My Computer is called This Infernal Contraption
Dialup Networking is called Good Ol' Boys
Control Panel is known as the Dern Dashboard
Hard Drive is referred to as 4 wheel drive
Floppies are them little ole plastic disc thangs.
Other features:
Instead of an error message you get a winder covered with a garbage bag and duct tape.
OK = ats aww-right
cancel = hail no
reset = awa shoot
yes = shore
no = Naaaa
find = hunt-fer it
go to = over yonder
back = back yonder
help = hep me out here
stop = ternit off
start = crank it up
settings = sittins
programs = stuff that does stuff
documents = stuff I done done
Also note that winders 98 does not recognize capital letters or punctuation marks.
Some programs that are exclusive to winders 98:
tiperiter................A word processor
colering book............a graphics program
addin mershene...........calculator
scratch paper ...........notepad
jupe-box ................CD Player
inner-net................Microsoft Explorer
pichers..................A graphics viewer
IRS......................M/S accounting software
IRS2.....................M/S accounting software with hidden files
coon dog.................American kennel club records
fishin...................Bass Anglers Sportsman Society records.
NRA......................National Rifle Association
shot gun ................Remington Arms price list
riffel...................Winchester price list
pisstel..................Smith & Wesson price list
truck....................Ford & Chevrolet dealers in GA. by zip code
house....................Nearest Mobil home repair service by zip code
car .....................same as truck, just need two lists in Texas
cuzzins..................family history usually a 3 meg file
tax records..............usually an empty file
shells...................ammunition inventory, another 3 meg file
bud......................list of Budwiser dealers by zip code
racin....................NASCAR racing schedule includes list of TV stations that carry the race car n' truck
Parts.......nearest Junk yard by zip code
doc .....................veterinarians by zip code
We regret any inconvenience it may have caused if you received a copy of the Georgia edition. You may return it to Microsoft for a replacement version.
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June 21st, 2002, 07:30 PM
#2
Member
Attitude is a small thing that makes a BIG difference.
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June 21st, 2002, 07:37 PM
#3
Senior Member
nice =) do you make that up or did ya' steal it from somewhere. The jokes on this board are getting quite good lol.
P
\"Why is the bomb always gettin\' the last word?\" - Will Smith - Lost & Found (2005)
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June 21st, 2002, 07:56 PM
#4
he "borrowed" it.. as i've seen it before..
good thing i'm from the north or I'd ..... nm lol
it is funny 'tho
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June 21st, 2002, 08:22 PM
#5
I've always seen good jokes on this board. That was a really good one.
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June 21st, 2002, 09:34 PM
#6
Junior Member
That was pretty good, I've seen stuff like it before tho... I like mac jokes too (because i hate macs but thats a whole 'nother topic) keep em' up!
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June 28th, 2002, 06:29 PM
#7
Member
this one was nice. joke on this board are good!
I AM THE INTERNET
I AM tHeHeTeRiC
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June 28th, 2002, 06:37 PM
#8
Banned
yeah i seen this georgia joke before also, but i actualy hacked the .dll files in windows once sothat it looked like the georgia edition........ what can i say? i got bored......
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June 28th, 2002, 06:40 PM
#9
here was one that i posted a few months ago. I also have the brooklen edition but i cant find it right now
[gloworange]\"A hacker is someone who has a passion for technology, someone who is possessed by a desire to figure out how things work.\" [/gloworange]
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May 28th, 2003, 06:49 PM
#10
ya that was pretty good joke blow
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