real internet humor
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Thread: real internet humor

  1. #1
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2002
    Posts
    1,210

    real internet humor

    I was searching the forums for something and I came across this thread in alt.hackintosh
    entitled "An actual "hack"-intosh question " .. and curious me, found a gem of humor ...
    does it seem all too familar ?

    the thread is here >> http://www.antionline.com/showthread...threadid=18131

    and here is a quip from what purtains to be the FAQ of alt.hackintosh:

    David,

    You obviously are new to this newsgroup. We havent seen you around here before. Perhaps
    you should read the revised FAQ in order to improve future postings.

    *CONTENTS*

    1. WHAT IS ALT.HACKINTOSH?
    2. WHAT SHOULD I POST?
    3. WHAT SHOULDN'T I POST?
    4. WHERE CAN I GET WAREZ?
    5. WHERE CAN I GET THE SERIAL NUMBER FOR PROGRAM X?
    6. WHERE CAN I GET ...

    7. WHAT IS ALT.HACKINTOSH?

    alt.hackintosh is fundamentally a hacking newsgroup. Not to be confused with computer
    hacking, this is in the vane of pathological "a-social" hacking. The newsgroup, originally
    designed for some far less attractive purpose that served little in the way of the
    emotional needs of stunted personalities, it has rapidly grown into a forum of vapid and
    moronic insults, cretinous rejoinders to those moronic insults, immediately followed by
    Boeotian non-sequitor speculation on the racial heritage and sexual orientation of three
    posters previous. The ultimate goal of these complex interchanges is to get in "the last
    word", each poster totally convinced that he in his turn, is issuing the ultimate insipid
    rebuttal that is so indefatigably simple-minded that he is "Imbecile Par Excellanse" or,
    conversely, so embittered and malignant that his is the "Rancorous Stinch Supreme" that
    others can only dumbly envy.

    It is considered "off topic" or unsuitable for posting in this newgroup
    if:
    - the posting does not contain an inane personal insult
    - the posting does not address the supersilious issue of alt.hackintosh, the issue of
    Serial Numbers
    - the posting does not address the previous inane insult that it follows up

    2. WHAT SHOULD I POST?

    This was probably adequately addressed in the first question, and one might only add some
    reference to the painful removal of some body appendage of the previous poster, should one
    be so unfortunate as to meet, "in real life", one of the sociopaths who regularly converse
    here. What is most important is that you post. Ignoring an inanity is considered "shallow
    character" in alt.hac. Each mindless comment should be addressed in detail with each
    proceding post being more rancid than the preceding rancidity.

    3. WHAT SHOULDN'T I POST?

    There are no specific criteria as to what is on topic, but generally things that are not
    suitable for hack&tosh neither relate to `Hack', as in embittered vindictive attacks of
    "social hacking" nor to `tosh' the germanic equivalent of half-witted blather. There is
    some confusion about the origin of the name of the newsgroup. The derivation of "Hack"
    should be obvious from the indiscriminate and essentially pointless venom that pervades
    most "on topic posts". The word "tosh", less familiar to many, relates to the second major
    facit of a.hac, that is inarticulate dimness, as in it's etymological cousin, "pish-tosh".

    If you must respond to some newby's computer related inquiry, it is considered proforma to
    first delinate exactly how the question was too stupid to be posted in such an esoteric
    group, mention the size, shape and configuration of the original enquirers head, mention
    the size, shape, and odiferous quality of the original poster's posterior, perhaps, but
    only briefly allude to the original question making absolutely clear that you didnt even
    begin to understand what was being asked, and conclude with insinuations about the sexual
    proclivities of the original poster's mother.

    4. WHERE CAN I GET Witty reparte'?

    You are looking in the wrong place.

    5. WHERE CAN I GET THE SERIAL NUMBER FOR PROGRAMX?

    This is a very good question and we are all so glad you asked because it will give use the
    opportunity to spend hours pontificating into the night constructing new and insightful
    arguments addressing this question that interests only the very most "serious" hackers.

    ....

    And so on but we should not digress from the task at hand, spittle on the keyboard.
    oh.. edit: if you do happen to be a noobie to AO.. keep in mind that although you can
    see and post in the newsgroups they are NOT a part of AO.. (so don't go posting thinking such a thing)

  2. #2
    Banned
    Join Date
    Jul 2002
    Posts
    18
    that is funny

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