Hacker Barbie
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 14

Thread: Hacker Barbie

  1. #1
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2002
    Posts
    1,210

    Talking Hacker Barbie

    Author: Unknown

    (LA, California) Mattel announces their new line of Barbie
    products, the "Hacker Barbie." These new dolls will be released
    next month. The aim of these dolls is to negate the stereotype
    that women are numerophobic, computer-illiterate, and
    academically challenged.

    This new line of Barbie dolls comes equipped with Barbie's very
    own X-terminal and UNIX documentation as well as ORA's "In a
    Nutshell" series. The Barbie clothing includes a dirty button-up
    shirt and a pair of well-worn jeans. Accessories include a Casio
    all-purpose watch, and glasses with lenses thick enough to set
    ants on fire. (Pocket protectors and HP calculators optional.)

    The new Barbie has the incredible ability to stare at the screen
    without blinking her eyes and to go without eating or drinking
    for 16 hours straight. Her vocabulary mainly consists of
    technical terms such as "What's you're Internet address?", "I
    like TCP/IP!", "Bummer! Your kernel must have gotten trashed,"
    "Can't you grep that file?", and "DEC's Alpha AXP is awesome!"

    "We are very excited about this product," said Ken Olsen,
    Marketing Executive, "and we hope that the Hacker Barbie will
    offset the damage incurred by the mathophobic Barbie." (A year
    ago, Mattel released Barbie dolls that say, "Math is hard," with
    a condescending companion Ken.) The Hacker Barbie's Ken is an
    incompetent management consultant who frequently asks Barbie for
    help.

    The leading feminists are equally excited about this new line of
    Barbie dolls. Naomi Falodji says, "I believe that these new dolls
    will finally terminate the notion that women are inherently
    inferior when it comes to mathematics and the sciences. However,
    I feel that Ken's hierarchical superiority would simply reinforce
    the patriarchy and oppress the masses." Mattel made no comment.

    Parents, however, are worried that they will fall behind the
    children technologically when the Hacker Barbie comes out. "My
    daughter Jenny plays with the prototype Hacker Barbie for two
    days," says Mrs. Mary Carlson of rural Oxford, Mississippi, "and
    now she pays my credit card bill online. Got no idea how she does
    it, but she surely does it. I just don't wanna be looked upon as
    some dumb mama." Mattel will be offering free training courses
    for those who purchase the Hacker Barbie.

    The future Hacker Barbie will include several variations to deal
    with the complex aspects of Barbie. "Hacker Barbie Goes to Jail"
    will teach computer ethics to youngsters, while "BARBIE RITES
    L1KE BIFF!!!" will serve as an introduction to expository writing.

  2. #2
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2002
    Posts
    889
    Ah what about the skirt? AKA packaging? No disrespectet intended. But back in the 50's sisters I had and well as a male looked was plastic LOL..humor..funny a wired Barbie so I bet she is a go grrl...fine by me. Why to old to be noticed LOL you young guys well ah ask Dad when ya grow up LOL
    I believe that one of the characteristics of the human race - possibly the one that is primarily responsible for its course of evolution - is that it has grown by creatively responding to failure.- Glen Seaborg

  3. #3
    Banned
    Join Date
    Jun 2002
    Posts
    119
    I will be the first to buy one of these. I used to love my barbies as a kid~!

  4. #4
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2001
    Posts
    201
    Hell id get one :P So what if im male !!!

  5. #5
    Banned
    Join Date
    Oct 2001
    Posts
    297
    Is that Hacker Barbie or UNIX Admin Barbie?

  6. #6
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2001
    Posts
    201
    Both !!! Id play with them alot!! Have them sitting on my RH CDs etc etc

  7. #7
    Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2002
    Posts
    47
    Is Ken still the dumb jock then? No cyber ken to accompany Hacker Barbie?
    Mafia = Organized Crime
    Government = Unorganized Crime

  8. #8
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2001
    Location
    Ireland
    Posts
    735


    We are very excited about this product," said Ken Olsen,
    Marketing Executive, "and we hope that the Hacker Barbie will
    offset the damage incurred by the mathophobic Barbie." (A year
    ago, Mattel released Barbie dolls that say, "Math is hard," with
    a condescending companion Ken.)

  9. #9
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Posts
    236
    lol, BOFH Barbie, Kernel hacker Barbie,
    I can allready see the entire new line of dolls

  10. #10
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2001
    Posts
    259
    Originally posted here by Suberme
    Is Ken still the dumb jock then? No cyber ken to accompany Hacker Barbie?
    That's all we need is some angst ridden creapy looking ken following around barbi hopeing she'll go out with him until he realizes that barbi just feals sorry for Ken.
    Alternate realities celebrate reality. If you cant handle the reality your in, then you wont be able to handle the one your attempting to escape to.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •