August 29th, 2002, 10:47 PM
Computer Stupidities (the hotliners hell)
here is one of the funniest sites I have ever read:
* Him: "When I start up my computer and have to type in my program, I can use the numbers on the right side of the keyboard. So that is great. But sometimes, if I hit numlock, they don't work anymore, and I have to use the ones above the letters. They work again if I hit numlock and a light goes on. Is this right?"
* Me: "Yes. Numlock is the number lock key. It lets you switch between--"
* Him: "So it's not broken?"
* Me: "No."
* Him: "Well I think you should tell others about this feature. I think they could use it."
* Me: "That's a great idea."
* Him: "Great then. Bye."
* Me: "Bye."
The worst stupidities that hotliners listen in their job.
You will be surprised.
Life is boring. Play NetHack... --more--
August 29th, 2002, 11:20 PM
Here's a Dumb Conversation I had today
Background:- I try to phone companies / private individuals that send us Virus infected E-Mails, to give them a "heads up"
::: Ringing phone :::
Owner of small shop with online pages (hereafter called him) : "hello"
Me : "can I speak to ****** please"
him : "Speaking"
Me : "hi my name is ***** and I work as a Systems Administrator for ***** and I'm ringing to give you a heads up about a virus infection that you have. I'm sorry to say that it appears that one or more of your computers is infected with the Klez Virus."
him: (no **** this is the very next thing he said) "You obviously don't know anything about viruses I don't have anything in my addressbook"
Me: "I'm sorry?"
Him: "you can only get viruses through your address book everyone knows that"
Me: "Actually Klez scans through various types of files to look for E-mail addresses"
Him: "what day was it? because I didn't have my modem that day!" (i hadn't told him)
Me: "I assure you sir the mail came from you"
him : "I repeat you can only spread viruses through your address book, you must know nothing about viruses"
Me: (imaginary) Listen you dumb **** you're sending us viruses, stop it, disinfect your machine, and learn to get a clue, before I ask Legal to write you a few sternly worded notes ********** "
Me (in reality) Well sir this was just a friendly heads up, I'm sorry to have disturbed you.
:::: clickety click ::::: Killfiled ::::
I can't believe that there are such idiots out there, sorry but the above conversation reminded me about the call.
August 29th, 2002, 11:32 PM
I remember one call I got where the lady on the other line was stuck at the "I agree" portion of a new computer setup. She said she couldn't get past that screen. I asked several questions like is it locked up, is the keyboard and mouse connected right. Her next question... "Whats a mouse?" I told her to move the thing thats connected next to the keyboard.. her: "Ohhhhh! Thats how it works!"
August 30th, 2002, 12:16 AM
This is an actual call that I took. At the time we were supporting a small local isp in Colorado. This lady calls in and says that her "modeeum" isn't working. I asked her what this modeeum is and she tells me that it is the "thing with all the gold teeth on it" Well, what threw me at first is the fact that she mispronounce the work modem as modeeum. After i figured it out....I couldn't understand what she meant by "gold teeth on it" Suddenly it hit me....Here we were checking the status of the modem in windows (yes, her computer was on) and she had removed the cover and pulled the modem out of the pci slot (all while the pc was on) I had to mute the call i was laughing so hard. I told the cust to call the people that built the comp for her to have them get the modeeum working again. Amazingly, they reinstalled it and she had not messed up her mobo....Just goes to show you that the ignorant ones also seem to have all the luck
M$ support is like shooting yourself in the left foot and then putting a band-aid on the right one.
August 30th, 2002, 02:32 AM
I work at a small computer store, and we have this one hotel that we have done networking for and continue to support if they have any problems. The first of two was when I got a call saying that one of they're computers would start up and just freeze, so I drove all the way up there the very next day only to switch the mouse and keyboard to their appropiate slots and leave.
Then a week later, they're network went down. They had to wait two days until I could get there (because apparently I'm the only one at my store that could do anything). So I go up there, look around and notice that some dumb shmoe turned off the computer that routes they're whole network. I think the sad thing is they're paying us good money to do this.
September 6th, 2002, 11:15 PM
i have one for you guys: the day i started work for a company a service tech was called to come out and upgrade the hard drive on a $20,000 server with $4,000 worth of hard drive in it when the tech finished he had by mistake pluged all the power plugs in backward and without realizing it had flipped the power switch to boot up the server. he said all of a sudden smoke was pouring out of the cabinet and the system would not respond. he could not figure it out so he called the boss and the boss came out and soon after fired the guy.
gee i wonder why??
Ametuers get jail time Pros get jobs.