Clever toughts
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Thread: Clever toughts

  1. #1
    Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2002
    Posts
    46

    Wink Clever toughts

    here are some of the most clever toughts and ponderings, is strange but most of them make sence 8)



    The only reason they say 'women and children first' is to test the strength of the lifeboats.

    - Judy Allen


    _____________________________________________________________________________

    If you can't drink and drive, why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor, and why do bars have parking

    lots?

    _____________________________________________________________________________

    If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?

    _____________________________________________________________________________

    If nothing ever sticks to TEFLON, how do they make TEFLON stick to the pan?

    _____________________________________________________________________________

    If you're in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?

    _____________________________________________________________________________

    Why is it that when you transport something by car, it's called a shipment, but when you transport something by

    ship, it's called cargo?

    _____________________________________________________________________________

    You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes, why can't they make the whole plane out

    of the same substance?

    _____________________________________________________________________________

    If you have your finger touching the rearview mirror that says -- "objects in mirror are closer than they

    appear", how can that be possible?

    _____________________________________________________________________________

    Why does your nose run and your feet smell?

    _____________________________________________________________________________

    If pro is the opposite of con, is progress the opposite of congress?

    _____________________________________________________________________________

    Why is it called a "building" when it is already built?


    _____________________________________________________________________________

    Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

    _____________________________________________________________________________

    If 75% of all accidents happen within 5 miles of home, why not move 10 miles away?

    _____________________________________________________________________________

    Why is there only ONE Monopolies Commission?

    _____________________________________________________________________________

    Why do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections?

    _____________________________________________________________________________

    How do you KNOW it's new and improved dog food?

    _____________________________________________________________________________

    Why is it called rush hour when everything moves so slow?

    _____________________________________________________________________________

    If the universe is expanding, what is it expanding into?

    _____________________________________________________________________________

    How do you handcuff a one-armed man?

    _____________________________________________________________________________


    Hope you enjoy ( i know i did ),
    Bug_
    -Mamma... Mamma... I want to let school !!! - kid
    -Why my dear? - Mom
    -Because i heard in television that some guy was killed because he knew to much!!!-Kid

  2. #2
    Lmfao, That was good man.. I loved them all. Some of them I can say I've heard about and some had me laughing. Thanks dude.. -- JCHostingAdmin

  3. #3
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2002
    Posts
    1,050
    funny i have heard most of the my fave if you cant drink and drive why do u need a drivers license to but alcohol and wht do bars have parking lots hehe why is that?
    By the sacred **** of the sacred psychedelic tibetan yeti ....We\'ll smoke the chinese out
    The 20th century pharoes have the slaves demanding work
    http://muaythaiscotland.com/

  4. #4
    Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2002
    Posts
    46
    If you're in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?
    Now i know why i don't se anything when i'm driving at night


    Nah... just kidding


    Glad you like it,
    Bug_
    -Mamma... Mamma... I want to let school !!! - kid
    -Why my dear? - Mom
    -Because i heard in television that some guy was killed because he knew to much!!!-Kid

  5. #5
    Old Fart
    Join Date
    Jun 2002
    Posts
    1,658
    If drinking and driving is illegal, why do liquor stores have 'drive-thru' windows?
    Al
    It isn't paranoia when you KNOW they're out to get you...

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