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Thread: Enjoy...

  1. #1
    Old ancient one vanman's Avatar
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    Enjoy...

    Greetings people,
    I got this in my e-mail this morning and thought I would like to share it with you. Enjoy!!
    So which is your favorite?

    1.You have two choices in life: you can stay single and be miserable, or get married and wish you were dead.
    2.Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want, and then when you see what the other person has, you wish you had ordered that.
    3.At the cocktail party, one woman said to another, “Aren’t you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger, “Yes I am, I married the wrong woman.”
    4.Ater a quarrel, a husband said to his wife, you know, I was a fool when I married you.” She replied, “Yes dear, but I was in love and didn’t notice.”
    5.A lady inserted an ad in the classifieds “Husband wanted.” Next day she received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing:” You can have mine.”
    6.When a woman steels your husband, there is no better revenge than to let her keep him.
    7.Man is uncomplete until he is married. Then he is finished.
    8.Alittle boy asked his father how much it costs to get married?” And the father replied,” I don’t know son I am still paying.”
    9.Young son: Is it true dad that in some parts of Africa a man doesn’t know his wife until he marries her? Dad: That happens in every country, son.
    10.A woman was telling her friend “It is me who made my husband a millionare.””And what was he before you married him?” asked the friend. The woman replied “A billionaire.”
    11.Just think if it were not for marriage, men would go trough life thinking they had no faults at all.
    12.Husband: Want a quickie? Wife: As opposed to what?
    13.The most effective way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once.
    14.First guy (proudly):”My wife’s an angel!” Second guy:” You are lucky, mine’s still alive.”

    Some good one’s I think.
    What would life be if we couldn’t laugh once a while? I have decided to make it my daily good deed.

    Regards
    V/man
    Practise what you preach.

  2. #2
    Senior Member
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    Well it is really cool.
    U get What U pay for.

  3. #3
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    Thumbs up

    Now that funny hehe, being it is a joke it is not 100% true but partly true. Good job.
    [gloworange]I pLaY mY eNeMyS lIkE a ChEsS.[/gloworange]

  4. #4
    Funny . Specially, I liked this one

    Young son: Is it true dad that in some parts of Africa a man doesn’t know his wife until he marries her? Dad: That happens in every country, son.
    Hi! I am new to these forums.......

  5. #5
    Old ancient one vanman's Avatar
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    Glad you guys enjoyed it.Having a laugh every now and then certainly makes my day.

    regards
    v/man
    Practise what you preach.

  6. #6
    That was really funny thanks

  7. #7
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    Smile Here's another one!

    At a doctors surgery one morning a patient arrives complaining of serious backache. The doctor examines him and asks him"What the hell did you do to your back?"

    The patient replies "You know that I work for a local night club. Today morning I got home to my apartment early and heard a noise in my bedroom.On entering I knew someone had been sleeping with my wife and the balcony door was open. I rushed out the balcony door and did not find anyone. AsI looked down from the balcony I saw a man running out and he was dressing himself. I grabbed the fridge and threw it at him,That's how I strained my back"

    The 2nd patient arrives looking as if he has been in a car wreck.
    The doctor says "My previous patient looked bad, but you look terrible.What the hell happened to you?" He replies, "You know I have been unemployed for a while now. Today was the first day at my new job. I forgot to set my alarm and was running late. I was running out of the building, getting dressed at the same time, and you won't believe it but I was hit by a fridge."

    The 3rd patient arrives; he looks even worse than the other two patients do. The doctor is shocked. Again asks,
    "What the hell happened to you?"
    "Well I was sitting in a fridge & someone threw it from the 3rd floor!"

  8. #8
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    Smile

    Hey, now shouldn't these qualify as tutorials? just kidding..thanks for the laugh

  9. #9
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    haaa Very funny. I like that. Thank for posting funny things..

  10. #10
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    lol v.funny
    love this one , i should tell it to my wife.
    First guy (proudly):”My wife’s an angel!” Second guy:” You are lucky, mine’s still alive.”
    When the power of Love overcomes the Love of power, the world will know peace... Jimi Hendrix
    -------------------------------------------------------------
    I dream of giving birth to a child who will ask...... what was war?

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