November 7th, 2002 02:02 PM
Types Of Programmers
Techie Type Programmers
The truth is that there are big differences in techie types. The hardware people are radically different from the software people, and on the software side alone, there are at least three subspecies of programmers.
Forget about the first subspecies, the lumpenprogrammers, who typically spend their careers maintaining mainframe computer code at insurance companies. Lumpenprogrammers don't even like to program but have discovered that by the simple technique of leaving out the comments--clues, labels, and directions written in English--they are supposed to sprinkle in among their lines of computer code, their programs are rendered undecipherable by others, guaranteeing them a lifetime of dull employment.
The two programmer subspecies that are worthy of note are the hippies and the nerds. Nearly all great programmers are one type or the other. Hippie programmers have long hair and deliberately, even pridefully, ignore the seasons in their choice of clothing. They wear shorts and sandals in the winter and t-shirts all the time. Nerds are neat little anal-retentive men with penchants for short-sleeved shirts and pocket protectors. Nerds carry calculators; hippies borrow calculators. Nerds use decongestant nasal sprays; hippies snort cocaine. Nerds typically know forty-six different ways to make love but don't know any women. Hippies know women.
In the actual doing of that voodoo that they do so well, there's a major difference, too, in the way that hippies and nerds write computer programs. Hippies tend to do the right things poorly; nerds tend to do the wrong things well. Hippie programmers are very good at getting a sense of the correct shape of problem and how to solve it, but when it comes to the actual code writing, they can get sloppy and make major errors through pure boredom. For hippie programmers, the problem is solved when they've figured out how to solve it rather than later, when the work is finished and the problem no longer exists. Hippies live in the world of ideas. In contrast, nerds are so tightly focused on the niggly details of making a program feature work efficiently that they can completely fail to notice major flaws in the overall concept of the project.
Truly, i am a hippie
November 7th, 2002 02:26 PM
Hey you forgot us drunken,backwoods,gun nut,coon dog havin',nothing better to do programmers.We're the best of them all.
[shadow]I don\'t believe in anarchy.If you\'re not smart enough to beat the system it\'s your problem.
November 7th, 2002 02:28 PM
November 7th, 2002 02:42 PM
November 7th, 2002 04:58 PM
Damn, I wonder where I fit in I drink rarely, dont smoke, dont do coke, am not a nerd, know women and love women. Where do I fit in, in this world of pure anarchy..NOT. Actually I have no clue what I am saying. Nevertheless, there are also info hungry people like myself, our big drawback hard to concentrate on one thing. have to try everything, programmin, web design etc etc....I know there are more people like me out there...cheers to all my proggrammers, whether u like 40's or hard liquor u'll fit rite in. *mumbles* gotta stop drinking ..........
[gloworange]I pLaY mY eNeMyS lIkE a ChEsS.[/gloworange]
November 7th, 2002 06:13 PM
<< hippie programmer right here , lol - cool post :-)
yeah, I\'m gonna need that by friday...
November 7th, 2002 10:12 PM
I'd be the hippie's younger friend. Im the type of programer that wears a walkman as if it were a body part then puts bumper stickers on my PC & when asked to program for someone I do it at a unusual rate of speed so I'll have more time to program something I'd enjoy rather than for someone else.
November 8th, 2002 10:18 AM
lol specialist, i guess there's a real need of adding more to this, huh
well RiOtEr, thanks but eh, this article might be at 100's of places on the net, daz for sure
November 9th, 2002 05:18 AM
iz really too bad , people who give out antipoints done have a valid reason and balls enough to write their name after the assign.
November 9th, 2002 05:55 AM
What about the girly programers??
Surely we must have "types", too! :-)