UN-survey (humor?)
Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 26

Thread: UN-survey (humor?)

  1. #1
    Banned
    Join Date
    Aug 2001
    Location
    Yes
    Posts
    4,424

    UN-survey (humor?)

    Although this is meant to be humorous, I still think there's a lot of truth in it...


    Last month, the UN conducted a world-wide inquiry, asking only one question:
    "Could you please give your honest opinion about solutions for the food-scarcity in the rest of the world?'

    The survey turned out to be one giant failure:

    In Africa, they didn't know what 'food' meant.

    In Eastern-Europe, they didn't know what 'honest' meant.

    In Western-Europe, they didn't know what 'scarcity' meant.

    In China, they didn't know what 'opinion' meant.

    In Southern America, they didn't know what 'please' meant.

    And in the US, they didn't know what 'the rest of the world' meant.

  2. #2
    whaddya talking about Negative? Of course we love the rest of world.

  3. #3
    Priapistic Monk KorpDeath's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2001
    Posts
    2,628
    That's pretty funny. I like the punchline.

    This brings up an interesting issue.... After the "war in Iraq" should the U.S. pull all of it's troops out of U.N. "peace-keeping" missions around the world? I say, without hesitation, yes.

    This question probably deserves it's own thread but I'm too lazy to start another thread....
    Mankind have a great aversion to intellectual labor; but even supposing knowledge to be easily attainable, more people would be content to be ignorant than would take even a little trouble to acquire it.
    - Samuel Johnson

  4. #4
    Banned
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Posts
    46
    hahahahhahahahahahahhaahhahah

    F@#ing hilarious but true

    we are ignorant, but who is gonna challenge it??????


    blah


    mllm

  5. #5
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2003
    Posts
    3,914
    haha.. Very very humerous...


    This reminds me of another joke which I received by email.

    Now for all of you non-Canadians.. we had a commercial a while back for Molson Canadian Beer... that tried to play on the patrioticness of Canadians.. The original comercial was this.

    I AM CANADIAN
    (clears Thoat)
    (the canadian one is actually a commercial and is all true!)

    Hey...
    I'm not a lumberjack, or a fur trader...
    and I don't live in an igloo, or eat blubber, or own a dogsled...
    and I don't know Jimmy, Sally or Suzy from Canada,
    although I'm certain they're really, really nice.

    I have a Prime Minister, not a President.
    I speak English & French, NOT American.
    and I pronounce it 'ABOUT', NOT 'A BOOT'.

    I can proudly sew my country's flag on my backpack.
    I believe in peace keeping, NOT policing.
    DIVERSITY, NOT assimilation,
    AND THAT THE BEAVER IS A TRULY PROUD AND NOBLE ANIMAL.

    A TOQUE IS A HAT, A CHESTERFIELD IS A COUCH,
    AND IT IS PRONOUNCED 'ZED' NOT 'ZEE', 'ZED'!!!
    CANADA IS THE SECOND LARGEST LANDMASS!
    THE FIRST NATION OF HOCKEY! AND THE BEST PART OF NORTH AMERICA!

    MY NAME IS JOE!! AND I AM CANADIAN!!!!!!!!
    This was redone for several other nationalities, but the one that sticks out the most is the American one.. I have bolded the section which this thread reminded me of.

    I AM AMERICAN

    Wassup...
    I'm not particularly intelligent, open-minded, or well-liked.
    And I don't live in a safe place, eat a balanced diet, or drive very well.
    I don't know Shakespeare, Da Vinci or Gutenberg,
    although I'm pretty sure they were American.

    I drink beer, not water, I am outspoken, not opinionated,
    Guns settle disputes, not discussions.
    Winning isn't everything, it's the ONLY thing,
    And it's pronounced RUFF, not ROOF.

    I can proudly sew my country's flag on my backpack, unless I go somewhere.
    Burger King IS fine dining. Washing after peeing is for LOSERS,
    Twinkies and Moon Pies ARE GOOD for breakfast,
    I have a SHED, NOT a GARAGE, and WWF ACTION IS REAL!

    The UNITED STATES OF AMERICA is the ONLY country in the world,
    The FIRST nation of IGNORANCE,
    And the BEST part of SOUTH AMERICA!!

    MY NAME IS JIM-BOB, I am married to my sister,
    AND I AM AMERICAN!!!!!!!
    Anyways yeah.. this is meant as a joke... mostly heh

  6. #6
    Priapistic Monk KorpDeath's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2001
    Posts
    2,628
    Originally posted here by HTRegz
    haha.. Very very humerous...


    This reminds me of another joke which I received by email.

    Now for all of you non-Canadians.. we had a commercial a while back for Molson Canadian Beer... that tried to play on the patrioticness of Canadians.. The original comercial was this.



    This was redone for several other nationalities, but the one that sticks out the most is the American one.. I have bolded the section which this thread reminded me of.



    Anyways yeah.. this is meant as a joke... mostly heh
    So you concur that the U.S. should pull it's troops out of all of the U.N.peacekeeping missions? I mean, the U.N. shouldn't be seen dead with the likes of the U.S. and it's military..... ignorant as we are.
    Mankind have a great aversion to intellectual labor; but even supposing knowledge to be easily attainable, more people would be content to be ignorant than would take even a little trouble to acquire it.
    - Samuel Johnson

  7. #7
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2001
    Posts
    472
    Originally posted here by KorpDeath
    This brings up an interesting issue.... After the "war in Iraq" should the U.S. pull all of it's troops out of U.N. "peace-keeping" missions around the world?
    Yeah why not. They probably gonna need them in one of their "war-starting" missions. Hell, why keep peace when it's som much more fun to start another war?
    ---
    proactive

  8. #8
    Priapistic Monk KorpDeath's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2001
    Posts
    2,628
    Originally posted here by proactive

    Yeah why not. They probably gonna need them in one of their "war-starting" missions. Hell, why keep peace when it's som much more fun to start another war?
    I concur... why should we waste our military on interests that do not serve us. Why should we foot the majority of the U.N. bill when the U.N. doesn't back up it's own words. Abolish the U.N., it serves no purpose.

    For God's sake the leader of the human rights arm of the U.N. is Syria. Qadaffy Duck (I know I spelled it wrong) is not the best person to have as leader of the human rights arm, but I guess oil does give you ability to pull strings in the U.N., doesn't it?

    The U.N. is an instrument that is used by it's members....now let me ask you....who has the vast majority of seats in the U.N.?

    The obvious may miss you, but the truth won't.
    Mankind have a great aversion to intellectual labor; but even supposing knowledge to be easily attainable, more people would be content to be ignorant than would take even a little trouble to acquire it.
    - Samuel Johnson

  9. #9
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2003
    Posts
    193
    I AM AMERICAN

    Wassup...
    I'm not particularly intelligent, open-minded, or well-liked.
    And I don't live in a safe place, eat a balanced diet, or drive very well.
    I don't know Shakespeare, Da Vinci or Gutenberg,
    although I'm pretty sure they were American.

    I drink beer, not water, I am outspoken, not opinionated,
    Guns settle disputes, not discussions.
    Winning isn't everything, it's the ONLY thing,
    And it's pronounced RUFF, not ROOF.

    I can proudly sew my country's flag on my backpack, unless I go somewhere.
    Burger King IS fine dining. Washing after peeing is for LOSERS,
    Twinkies and Moon Pies ARE GOOD for breakfast,
    I have a SHED, NOT a GARAGE, and WWF ACTION IS REAL!

    The UNITED STATES OF AMERICA is the ONLY country in the world,
    The FIRST nation of IGNORANCE,
    And the BEST part of SOUTH AMERICA!!
    MY NAME IS JIM-BOB, I am married to my sister,
    AND I AM AMERICAN!!!!!!!
    Dhat's why wee R THE only superpower in the SOLAR SYSTEM..... learn from US or us
    Land of Free and Home of Brave or you can say it other way around, it means the same and it means we can break the english to the way we please and refuse to use as rest of the world use it. Still the number one and super power. Any ProblemS?


    Here is couple of light jokes

    A Canadian is walking down the street with a case of beer under his arm.
    His friend Doug stops him and asks, "Hey Bob! Whacha get the case of beer
    for?" "I got it for my wife, eh." answers Bob. "Oh!" exclaims Doug, "Good
    trade."

    ----

    In Canada there are two Seasons...six months of winter and six months of
    poor snowmobiling.


  10. #10
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2003
    Posts
    117
    And in the US, they didn't know what 'the rest of the world' meant.
    Lets find out if the quoted statement is really true:
    http://www.rethinkingschools.org/jus...s/mapgame.html

    I knew 8 before I tried this, how many can you get right on your first try?
    .sig - There never was a .sig?
    I own a Schneider EuroPC with MS-Dos 3.3 and it works.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •