Dear Andy
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Thread: Dear Andy

  1. #1
    GreekGoddess
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    Dear Andy

    Dear Andy:

    Q : My husband wants a threesome with my best friend and me.

    A : Obviously your husband cannot get enough of you! Knowing that there is only one of you he can only settle for the next best thing your best friend. Far from being an issue, this can only bring you closer together. Why not get some of your old college roommates involved too? If you are still apprehensive, maybe you should let him be with your friends without you. If you're still not sure then just perform oral sex on him and cook him a nice meal while you think about it.

    Q : My husband continually asks me to perform oral sex on him.

    A : Do it. Semen can help you lose weight and gives a great glow to your skin. Interestingly, men know this. His offer to allow you to perform oral sex on him is totally selfless. This shows he loves you. The best thing to do is to thank him by performing it twice a day: Then cook him a nice meal.

    Q : My husband has too many nights out with the boys.

    A : This is perfectly natural behavior and it should be encouraged. The man is a hunter and he needs to prove his prowess with other men. A night out chasing young single girls is great stress relief and can foster a more peaceful and relaxing home. Remember, nothing can rekindle your relationship better than the man being away for a day or two (it's great time to clean the house too!) Just look at how emotional and happy he is when he returns to his stable home. The best thing to do when he returns home is for you and your best friend to perform oral sex on him. Then cook him a nice meal.

    Q : My husband doesn't know where my clitoris is.

    A : Your clitoris is of no concern to your husband. If you must mess with it do it in your own time or ask your best friend to help. You may wish to videotape yourself while doing this, and present it to your husband as a birthday gift. To ease your selfish guilt, perform oral sex on him and cook him a delicious meal.

    Q : My husband is uninterested in foreplay.

    A : You are a bad person for bringing it up and should seek sensitivity training. Foreplay to man is very stressful and time consuming. Sex should be available to your husband on demand with no pesky requests for foreplay. What this means is that you do not love your man as much as you should; He should never have to work to get you in the mood. Stop being so selfish! Perhaps you can make it up to him by performing oral sex on him and cooking him a nice meal.

    Q : My husband always has an orgasm then rolls over and goes to sleep without giving me one.

    A : I'm not sure I understand the problem. Perhaps you've forgotten to cook him a nice meal.

  2. #2
    Member
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    Feb 2003
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    HAHA,
    That was great. Where did you get it, or did you just come up with that. I am so going to copy and print that to show friends. Hehe.

    -Ep
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  3. #3
    Gray Haired Old Fart aeallison's Avatar
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    So GG any other comments on this subject? Have you cooked your man a good meal yet? Or are you just one of those few ladies who would disagree with very thoughtful advice that was given?
    I have a question; are you the bug, or the windshield?

  4. #4
    Banned
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    whats up with the meals lol ....

    Do it. Semen can help you lose weight and gives a great glow to your skin. Interestingly, men know this. His offer to allow you to perform oral sex on him is totally selfless. This shows he loves you. The best thing to do is to thank him by performing it twice a day: Then cook him a nice meal.
    one thing to say *ROFL* hahahha gotta show this part to my next g/f

  5. #5
    GreekGoddess
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    You're next girlfriend? haha!

    And aeallison...no comment.

  6. #6
    Gray Haired Old Fart aeallison's Avatar
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    And aeallison...no comment.
    Awww! C'mon GG I am sure you must have at least one comment on your obviously well thought post. I mean at least you hid the post, that shows an opinion of some sort, be it negative or positive.
    I have a question; are you the bug, or the windshield?

  7. #7
    Banned
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    gradt one..
    tho i disagree with tha majority of it.. :P


    Nightfalls_Girl

  8. #8
    Senior Member Spyrus's Avatar
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    Hilarious..... now to convince the gf that these are the proper steps to be followed. I have this funny feeling im aiming for trouble
    Duct tape.....A whole lot of Duct Tape
    Spyware/Adaware problem click
    here

  9. #9
    GreekGoddess
    Guest
    Actually, it's funny as hell that a guy could be so...COLD. I guess that's the only word I can come up with for this...COLD...and it was so good, I've had it saved in my mailbox for a while now. It just really cracks me up.

  10. #10
    Flash M0nkey
    Join Date
    Sep 2001
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    3,447
    ummmm is this not the way everyone elses relationships are anyways??

    v_Ln

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