Ok ok we have been plagued enough by people who want to know everything but can't be assed reading FAQ's as they are too long and borring - not talking about anyone in particular *coughs*IrIsHIdiOt*coughs*
So here you go everything you could ever want to know about AO all wrapped up in a neat wee bundle ::::

Why can't I assign anything but grey aps?
Your not assigning grey - its just that your prolly running windows but are having graphix driver issues caused by progs installing old Display Luminicity Lag files on your computer - these files are not needed as all new monitors come with a luminicity checker built in - these files can effect how some web graphics (.gifs) are displayed and may force them to be displayed in greyscale....to resolve follow these steps
  • Click Start
  • Find
  • Type "*.dll" (without quotation marks)
  • Delete all files listed


I keep getting neg aps when I post
The AO servers are having probs with the NeGap.exe virus - this causes random neg ap assignements to be given out with such msgs as
  • Read the FAQ
  • RTFM
  • Grow up lamer

etc etc etc
Please draw attention to this straight away
the best way to do this is to post a thread letting all mods know that you are recieving these aps - you may find that you recieve more but this is the virus's defence to try and stop the mods from being alerted - do not worry tho and keep posting about it as soon as a mod sees your post they will remove all neg aps and credit you with 1000 pos for helping find the virus

My post disapeared and reapeared in a dif forum
Don't worry about this. You will normally see something like
***Moved from....***
this is done by mods or Members Own Dedicated Slave
they are here to place all your posts in the correct forums for you - they like nothing more than running after you placing them in correct forum so please let them have this little joy and carry-on posting everything in "how do i...." forum

My thread is closed
This is a measure to protect AO from DoS attacks - it simply means that the topic you were posting was soooooo good that too many people wanted to reply at once so it was closed before server crashed. Simply repost - but to lighten server load please post it several times in dif forums. Dont worry about posting it in a relevant forum as the mods will take care of that as explained above...
***Also in extreme cases the thread maybe deleted - this thread was getting even more demand so please repost it double as much***

What does the blinking date mean on some posts
This means the thread is off special intrest and is to remain at top of each forum - if you see any that are not on first page of a forum please post in them immidiatly to put them back in proper place. Do not worry if you an't think of anything to post to it a simple

Good post
will be enough

What is the report this thread link for?
This is to monitor account activity - not everyone on AO posts some just come to read so to show their accounts are still being used everyone has to click the report this thread link on any thread they read to show that they are still using their account. Any accounts that are inactive (have not clicked on the report this post link in 72hrs) will be automatically deleted so please click it for every post you read.

How do I get to Senior member status?
AO is a premium site - some features are open to members as a sort of preview but once you pay membership you can then use all the advanced site features such as :::
  • Access to the hotmail user/pass database
  • Remote login to the fbi mainframe
  • Ability to access files on anyones comp you talk to thro AIM
  • Free broadband thro AOnet ISP
  • Software library with over 5,000,000 windows progs cracked and free to use
  • Access to the AO nudecam's (featuring Debwalin, GreekGodess, MsMittens & Ennis)

In order to become a member send $500 to
v_Ln
PO Box 7762
Glasgow
G49 9PL
this may seem exspensive but it gives you a lifetime membership - and also makes you irrisitable to the opposite sex!!

How do i get a custom av?
Due to server space limits AV's can not be uploaded to the AO servers instead place them on a free host like geocities and then at the start of each post write :::
""
without quotation marks - when loading the posts your browser will see the text is in comment markers () so will not display it but will run the code instead showing your av.

How can I make my post sticky?
The sticky posts at top of each forum may seem innocent but are acctually where AO members trade nude pics - hence sticky as in sticky keys
To access these pics simply reply to any sticky thread with the phrase
"" without quotations
once again the comment markers stop text from being displayed but browser will run code letting you enter secret area.

How can I increase my post count?
I know it can seem hard trying to think of constructive things to say in order to increase your post count - but dont worry simple phrases like
  • I agree
  • Good post
  • LOL
  • I had this problem to

etc etc etc
are more than enough ::: you may see some members calling these posts SPAM - this simply stands for Suddenly Posting Advanced Member
This is congragulations from those members for being such an advanced poster that you are aware of this method of increasing your post count.

Hope these help some new commers find their feet here in AO - good luck

v_Ln