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Thread: Be Forewarned !!!

  1. #1
    T̙͓̞̣̯ͦͭͅͅȂͧͭͧ̏̈͏̖̖Z̿ ͆̎̄
    Join Date
    Dec 2004

    Be Forewarned !!!

    Not sure who the original author is so I can't credit him but...

    It may be too late for you to heed this Install problem without a huge,
    expensive work-around, BUT OTHERS MUST BE WARNED!!!!!!!

    Last year a friend of mine upgraded GirlFriend 1.0 to Wife 1.0 and found
    that it's a memory hog leaving very little system resources for other
    applications. He is only now noticing that Wife 1.0 also is spawning
    Child-Processes which are further consuming valuable resources. No mention
    of this particular phenomena was included in the product brochure or the
    documentation, though other users have informed him that this is to be
    expected due to the nature of the application.

    Not only that, Wife 1.0 installs itself such that it is always launched at
    system initialization where it can monitor all other system activity. He's
    finding that some applications such as PokerNight 10.3, BeerBash 2.5, and
    PubNight 7.0 are no longer able to run in the system at all, crashing the
    system when selected (even though they always worked fine before). At
    installation, Wife 1.0 provides no option as to the installation of
    undesired Plug-Ins such as MotherInLaw 55.8 and BrotherInLaw Beta release.
    Also, system performance seems to diminish with each passing day.

    Some features he'd like to see in the upcoming wife 2.0.
    - A "Don't remind me again" button
    - Minimize button
    - An install shield feature that allows Wife 2.0 be installed with the
    option to uninstall at anytime without the loss of cache and other
    system resources.
    - An option to run the network driver in promiscuous mode which would
    allow the systems hardware probe feature to be much more useful.

    I myself decided to avoid all of the headaches associated with Wife 1.0 by
    sticking with Girlfriend 2.0. Even here, however, I found many problems.

    Apparently you cannot install Girlfriend 2.0 on top of Girlfriend 1.0. You
    must uninstall Girlfriend 1.0 first. Other users say this is a long
    standing bug which I should have been aware of. Apparently the versions of
    Girlfriend have conflicts over shared use of the I/O port. You think they
    would have fixed such a stupid bug by now. To make matters worse, The
    uninstall program for Girlfriend 1.0 doesn't work very well leaving
    undesirable traces of the application in the system. Another thing that
    sucks -- all versions of Girlfriend continually popup little annoying
    messages about the advantages of upgrading to Wife 1.0

    ***** BUG WARNING ********
    Wife 1.0 has an undocumented bug. If you try to install Mistress 1.1 before
    uninstalling Wife 1.0, Wife 1.0 will delete MSMoney files before doing the
    uninstall itself. Then Mistress 1.1 will refuse to install, claiming
    insufficient resources.

    *** BUG WORK-AROUNDS ***************
    To avoid the above bug, try installing Mistress 1.1 on a different system
    and never run any file transfer applications such as Laplink 6.0. Also,
    beware of similar shareware applications that have been known to carry
    viruses that may affect Wife 1.0.

    Another solution would be to run Mistress 1.0 via a UseNet provider under
    an anonymous name. Here again, beware of the viruses which can accidentally
    be downloaded from the UseNet.


  2. #2
    T̙͓̞̣̯ͦͭͅͅȂͧͭͧ̏̈͏̖̖Z̿ ͆̎̄
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Be Forewarned cont...

    Important Warning for Men

    Police are warning all men who frequent clubs, parties and local
    pubs to be alert and stay cautious when offered a drink from any woman.

    A date rape drug on the market called "Beer" is used by many females to
    target unsuspecting men. The drug is generally found in liquid form and
    now available almost anywhere. It comes in bottles,
    cans and from taps and in large "kegs."

    Beer is used by female sexual predators at parties and bars to persuade
    their male victims to go home and have sex with them.
    Typically, a woman needs only to persuade a guy to consume a few units
    Beer and then simply ask him home for no strings attached sex.

    Men are rendered helpless against this approach. After several Beers,
    will often succumb to desires to perform sexual acts on horrific looking
    women to whom they would never normally be attracted.

    After drinking Beer men often awaken with only hazy memories of exactly
    happened to them the night before, often with just a vague feeling that
    "something bad" occurred.

    At other times these unfortunate men are swindled out of their life's
    savings, in a familiar scam known as "a relationship."

    It has been reported that in extreme cases, the female may even be
    enough to entrap the unsuspecting male into a longer term form of
    and punishment referred to as "marriage."

    Apparently, men are much more susceptible to this scam after Beer is
    administered and sex is offered by the predatory females.

    Please! Forward this warning to every male you know. If you fall victim
    this insidious Beer and the predatory women administering it, there are
    support groups with venues in every town where you can discuss the
    of your shocking encounter in an open and frank manner with similarly
    affected, like-minded guys.

    For the support group nearest you, just look up "Golf Courses" in the

  3. #3
    T̙͓̞̣̯ͦͭͅͅȂͧͭͧ̏̈͏̖̖Z̿ ͆̎̄
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    The Real Story Behind the Jack Schitt...

    The lineage is finally revealed. Many people are at a loss for a response when someone says "You don't know Jack Schitt!" Read on and you'll be able to handle the situation intelligently.

    Jack is the only son of Awe Schitt and O. Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, a partner of Kneedeep & Schitt, Inc.

    Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt, and the deeply religious couple begat 6 children: Holie Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Giva Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins, Deap Schitt and Dip Schitt.

    Against her parents' wishes, Deap Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout.

    After 15 years of marriage, Jack & Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later married a Mr. Sherlock, and out of devotion to her children, decided to hyphenate her last name, and became Noe Schitt-Sherlock.

    Dip Schitt married a woman named Loda Dung, who became Loda Schitt. The couple produced a nervous son, Chicken Schitt.

    Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, inseperable thoughout childhood subsequently married the Happens brothers. The local newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens wedding, which was quite an event. The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Hoarse.

    Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He returned from his travels with his Italian bride, Piza Schitt.

    So, NOW if someone says "You don't know Jack Schitt", you can beg to differ. You not only know Jack Schitt, but the entire Schitt list!

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