Nice Googlebomb
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  1. #1
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    Nice Googlebomb

    Hadn't seen this one yet: hit "I'm feeling lucky" for "French military victories".

  2. #2
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    Did you mean: french military defeats


    No standard web pages containing all your search terms were found.

    Your search - french military victories - did not match any documents.

    Suggestions:

    - Make sure all words are spelled correctly.
    - Try different keywords.
    - Try more general keywords.
    - Try fewer keywords.

    Also, you can try Google Answers for expert help with your search.


    Edit: Thanks Neg, that's an eye-opener. I clicked on the defeat link above and they most certainly have been spanked a multitude of times.
    Connection refused, try again later.

  3. #3
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    There's a bunch of inaccuracies in that "history", though - but that's a discussion for Cosmos

  4. #4
    In And Above Man Black Cluster's Avatar
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    Google is kiddin' us a lot .... lol .... a lot of defeats out there ........

    Try "I'm feeling Lucky" for "elgoog" ... try it this another cool one .... Google Miror ..
    \"The only truly secure system is one that is powered off, cast in a block of concrete and sealed in a lead-lined room with armed guards - and even then I have my doubts\".....Spaf
    Everytime I learn a new thing, I discover how ignorant I am.- ... Black Cluster

  5. #5
    Token drunken Irish guy
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    The French have won many a war.

  6. #6
    Senior Member nihil's Avatar
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    The French have won many a war.
    Actually Ennis, they haven't............the same can be said for most of the Continental European countries..............sure they win battles, but not wars............too many borders and too many enemies I would suggest. They tend to be forced to seek political solutions, and strong, diverse alliances. Hartshorne (spelling?) hinterland/heartland theory IIRC.

    It is far easier for well populated island states such as Britain and Japan to defend themselves, a pure geographical coincidence IMHO but true nonetheless. After all, it takes a fair bit of logistics to get a 30 ton tank 21 miles across the channel. Hey the Allies had exactly the same problem, and had four extra years to think about it

    Similarly, if Ireland had had a larger population and centralised government, the Brits would have never been able to invade it.

    The guys on the outside seem to do a bit better (Russia, Sweden, Denmark) as they are not surrounded.

    just a thought

  7. #7
    They call me the Hunted foxyloxley's Avatar
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    The French have won many a war.


    It is said that we should always see the future by learning from the past !!

    Have a laugh.........
    The military history of France:

    Gallic Wars - Lost. In a war whose ending foreshadows the next 2,000 years of French history.
    France is conquered by, of all things, an Italian.

    Hundred Years War - Mostly lost, saved at last by a female schizophrenic
    who inadvertently creates The First Rule of French Warfare:
    "France's armies are victorious only when not led by a Frenchman."

    Italian Wars - Lost. France becomes the first and only country to ever
    lose two wars when fighting Italians.

    Wars of Religion - France goes 0-5-4 against the Huguenots

    Thirty Years War - France is technically not a participant, but manages to
    get invaded anyway. Claims a tie on the basis that eventually the other
    participants started ignoring her.

    War of Devolution - Tied. Frenchmen take to wearing red flowerpots as
    chapeaux.

    The Dutch War - Tied.

    War of the Augsburg League / King William's War / French and Indian War Lost,
    but claimed as a tie. Three ties in a row induces deluded Francophiles
    the world over to label the period as the height of French military power.

    War of the Spanish Succession - Lost. The war also gave the French their
    first taste of a Marlborough, which they have loved ever since.

    American Revolution - In a move that will become quite familiar to future
    Americans, France claims a win even though the English colonists saw far
    more action. This is later known as "de Gaulle Syndrome," and leads to the
    Second Rule of French Warfare: "France only wins when America does most of the fighting."

    French Revolution - Won, primarily due the fact that the opponent was also French.

    The Napoleonic Wars - Lost. Temporary victories (remember the First Rule!)
    due to leadership of a Corsican, who ended up being no match for a British footwear designer.

    The Franco-Prussian War - Lost. Germany first plays the role of drunk frat
    boy to France's ugly girl home alone on a Saturday night.

    World War I - Tied and on the way to losing, France is saved by the United
    States. Thousands of French women find out what it's like to not only
    sleep with a winner, but one who doesn't call her "Fraulein."
    Sadly, widespread use of condoms by American forces forestalls any improvement in the French bloodline.

    World War II - Lost. Conquered French liberated by the United States and
    Britain just as they finish learning the Horst Wessel song.

    War in Indochina - Lost. French forces plead sickness, take to bed with
    the Dien Bien Flu.

    Algerian Rebellion - Lost. Loss marks the first defeat of a Western army
    by a Non-Turkic Muslim force since the Crusades, and produces the First Rule of Muslim Warfare:
    "We can always beat the French.
    " This rule is identical to the First Rules of the Italians, Russians, Germans,
    English, Dutch, Spanish, Vietnamese and Esquimaux.

    War on Terrorism - France, keeping in mind its recent history, surrenders to Germans and Muslims just to be safe.
    Attempts to surrender to Vietnamese ambassador fail after he takes refuge in a McDonald's.

    The question for any country silly enough to count on the French should
    not be "Can we count on the French?" but, rather, "How long until France
    collapses?"
    55 - I'm fiftyfeckinfive and STILL no wiser,
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  8. #8
    They call me the Hunted foxyloxley's Avatar
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    There's a bunch of inaccuracies in that "history", though - but that's a discussion for Cosmos
    It's been a while, but it COULD do with a kick start

    I have to plead prior peeved offness [see Sig] when it comes to France.

    Originally posted here by foxyloxley
    Ahh, the French.
    Tedob 1's Cosmos thread re:- the French

    Once upon a time (allegedly) in a nice little forest,
    there lived an orphaned bunny and an orphaned snake.
    By a surprising coincidence, both were blind from birth. One day, the bunny was hopping through the forest, and the snake was slithering through the forest, when the bunny tripped over the snake and fell down. This, of course, knocked the snake about quite a bit.

    "Oh, my," said the bunny, "I'm terribly sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you.
    I've been blind since birth, so, I can't see where I'm going. In fact, since
    I'm also an orphan, I don't even know what I am."

    "It's quite OK," replied the snake. "Actually, my story is much the same as yours.
    I, too, have been blind since birth, and also never knew my mother. Tell you what, maybe I could slither all over you, and work out what you are, so at least you'll have that going for you."
    "Oh, that would be wonderful" replied the bunny. So the snake slithered all over the bunny, and said, "Well, you're covered with soft fur; you have really long ears; your nose twitches; and you have a soft cottony tail. I'd say that you must be a bunny rabbit."

    "Oh, thank you! Thank you," cried the bunny, in obvious excitement. The bunny suggested to the snake, "Maybe I could feel you all over with my paw, and help you the same way that you've helped me."

    So the bunny felt the snake all over, and remarked,


    "Well, you're smooth and slippery, and you have a forked tongue, no backbone and no balls.










    I'd say you must be French."
    55 - I'm fiftyfeckinfive and STILL no wiser,
    OLDER yes
    Beware of Geeks bearing GIF's
    come and waste the day :P at The Taz Zone

  9. #9
    Flash M0nkey
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    the only thing france has going for it is its cognac

  10. #10
    Frustrated Mad Scientist
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    the only thing france has going for it is its cognac
    Brie is very nice.

    That's 2 things the surrender monkeys have going for them.

    -10 for having chicks with hairy armpits though.

    ****, just remembered I drive a French car [hangs head in shame].

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