What Were They Thinking?

CFO stops by IT to ask why the new e-commerce Web site is taking so long. Pilot fish explains that project team members just started on it a month before, using a new language per the CFO's specs -- on top of which they've been dealing with changes that had to be worked into the original design. CFO's response: "I wish there was a way we could just give the computer a set of rules instead of writing all this code." Grumbles fish, "After that, we just yessed him until he left."


PC is about to be redeployed, so new-hire techie decides to upgrade the BIOS. But something goes wrong during the upgrade. "He knew how to fix it -- remove the processor," reports a pilot fish on the scene. "Unfortunately, the processor was firmly attached to the motherboard. But that didn't deter this techie -- after a few minutes of applying pliers and brute force, he got it out. Luckily, that PC is the perfect weight to prop open the door to our test lab when we're working in there."


This pilot fish really likes his company's online change management system -- or did, anyway. "We e-mailed the change request to approvers, who rejected or accepted the change and put it into production," says fish. "It was paperless and efficient. Now a new process comes down from management: Print online form. Walk around and obtain physical signatures (approvers may be in a different building). Once request is approved, scan document, save as a PDF file and store it in an online document repository."

Going Down

"One of our engineers came in early today to load some software," reports an IT pilot fish. "As he stepped from the elevator, the CD slipped from under his arm and disappeared down through the crack between the elevator and the floor. The joke of the day is that he's trying to program the elevator but can't even find the button to eject the CD from it."

Not in the Plans

IT pilot fish is responsible for a million-dollar fault-tolerant server. "The system truly runs unattended, sometimes for months," says fish. "One day I walked into the computer room and found that building services had installed a sprinkler system, since 'the blueprints show one.' Building manager was adamant until I told him he could be responsible for washing down a million dollars' worth of computer equipment due to a false alarm. The pipes were gone the following week."