Sweater, n.:
A garment worn by a child when its mother feels chilly.

Grandpa Charnock's Law:
You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.

You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry a clipboard.

"I'm on a seafood diet -- I see food and I eat it."

Q. What`s the difference between Texas and yoghurt?
A. Yoghurt has culture.

Just a few of the perfect excuses for having some strawberry shortcake.
Pick one.

1: It's less calories than two pieces of strawberry shortcake.
2: It's cheaper than going to France.
3: It neutralizes the brownies I had yesterday.
4: Life is short.
5: It's somebody's birthday. I don't want them to celebrate alone.
6: It matches my eyes.
7: Whoever said, "Let them eat cake." must have been talking to me.
8: To punish myself for eating dessert yesterday.
9: Compensation for all the time I spend in the shower not eating.
10: Strawberry shortcake is evil. I must help rid the world of it.
11: I'm getting weak from eating all that healthy stuff.
12: It's the second anniversary of the night I ate plain broccoli.

<SomeLamer> what's the difference between chattr and chmod?
<SomeGuru> SomeLamer: man chattr > 1; man chmod > 2; diff -u 1 2 | less
-- Seen on #linux on irc