Thursday funnies

Hung Chow calls in to work and says, "Hey, boss I not
come work today, I really sick. I got headache, stomach
ache and my legs hurt. not come work."

The boss says, "You know Hung Chow, I really need you
today. When I feel like this I go to my wife and tell her to
give me sex. That makes me feel better and I can go to work.
You should try that."

Two hours later Hung Chow calls again: "Boss, I do what
you say and I feel great. I be at work soon. You got
nice house."

:D

A dad walks into a market followed by his ten-year-old son. The kid is
spinning a quarter in the air and catching it between his teeth. As they
walk through the market, someone bumps into the boy at just the wrong
moment. The coin goes straight into his mouth and lodges in his throat.
He immediately starts choking, going blue in the face and dad starts
panicking, shouting for help.
A well-dressed middle-aged, moderately attractive but serious woman in a
blue business suit is sitting at a coffee bar in the market, reading her
newspaper and sipping a cup of coffee. At the sound of the commotion, she
looks up, puts her coffee cup down on the saucer, neatly folds her
newspaper and places it on the counter. She then gets up from her seat
and makes her unhurried way across the market.

Reaching the boy, the woman carefully takes hold of the boy's testicles
and squeezes gently at first and then ever more firmly. After a few
seconds, the boy convulses violently and coughs up the quarter, which the
woman deftly catches in her free hand. Releasing the boy, the woman hands
the coin to the father and walks back to her seat at the coffee bar
without saying a word.

As soon as he is sure that his son has suffered no lasting ill- effects,
the father rushes over to the woman and starts effusively thanking her
saying, "I've never seen anybody do anything like that before - it was
fantastic! Are you a doctor?"

"Good heavens, no," the woman replies. "I'm a divorce attorney."

:D

And see the attached pic. It's absolutely beautiful.

The jokes were funny but the highlight of this post was the picture...truly beautiful...

Yeah. I should've given the picture it's own thread, just to share it.

What more can one say than "wow"

Heh, I live in New York, and you havnt seen anything until you see it in person... It is marvelous! Good jokes :D

Hey, ac1d, is it permanent or temporary?
If it's temporary, how long will it be up and on?

I LIKE IT A LOT

[QUOTE] Originally posted here by 11001001
Hey, ac1d, is it permanent or temporary?
If it's temporary, how long will it be up and on? [/QUOTE

It's temporary, I think it'll be on for one month. they started it on the 6 month anniversary.

Woah thats some weird **** bro. I seem to remember something similar to that quarter story man. lol WHAT THE **** AM I TALKING ABOUT?