Computer 1 Liners

46 Computer One-Liners

Copywight 1994 Elmer Fudd. All wights wesewved.

Cannot find REALITY.SYS. Universe halted.

COFFEE.EXE Missing - Insert Cup and Press Any Key

Buy a Pentium 586/90 so you can reboot faster.

Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.

Computers are not intelligent. They only think they are.

My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.

C:\WINDOWS C:\WINDOWS\GO C:\PC\CRAWL

C:\DOS C:\DOS\RUN RUN\DOS\RUN

Best file compression around: "FORMAT /Q C:" = 100% compression

The Definition of an Upgrade: Take old bugs out, put new ones in.

BREAKFAST.COM Halted...Cereal Port Not Responding

The name is Baud......, James Baud.

BUFFERS=20 FILES=15 2nd down, 4th quarter, 5 yards to go!

C:\> Bad command or file name! Go stand in the corner.

Bad command. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaay..

Why doesn't DOS ever say "EXCELLENT command or filename!"

As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing.

Southern DOS: Y'all reckon? (Yep/Nope)

E Pluribus Modem

>... File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N)

A mainframe: The biggest PC peripheral available.

An error? Impossible! My modem is error correcting.

CONGRESS.SYS Corrupted: Re-boot Washington D.C (Y/n)?

Does fuzzy logic tickle?

A computer's attention span is as long as it's power cord.

11th commandment - Covet not thy neighbor's Pentium.

Disinformation is not as good as datinformation.

Who's General Failure & why's he reading my disk?

Ultimate office automation: networked coffee.

RAM disk is *not* an installation procedure.

All computers wait at the same speed.

DEFINITION: Computer - A device designed to speed and automate errors.

Press CTRL-ALT-DEL to continue ...

Smash forehead on keyboard to continue.....

Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue...

ASCII stupid question, get a stupid ANSI!

E-mail returned to sender -- insufficient voltage.

Help! I'm modeming... and I can't hang up!!!

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Error: Keyboard not attached. Press F1 to continue.

"640K ought to be enough for anybody." - Bill Gates, 1981

DOS Tip #17: Add DEVICE=FNGRCROS.SYS to CONFIG.SYS

Hidden DOS secret: add BUGS=OFF to your CONFIG.SYS

Press any key... no, no, no, NOT THAT ONE!

Press any key to continue or any other key to quit...

Excuse me for butting in, but I'm interrupt-driven.




HE HE HE

these are from

http://c128133.net61215.cablenet.ne..../frconten.html

"The Definition of an Upgrade: Take old bugs out, put new ones in. "
Hehehehe.

I like it. Good post for a slow Tuesday morning.

well, i really was in need of a few laughs. Thx
Nice post... :)

Well done!
I think I may have a successor in the area of Nerd Humor ;)
God bless,
--PhirePhreak

Quote:

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Originally posted here by THE-OMEN

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The funny thing is we actually did this to someone. Boy was he pissed!

KEEP EM COMMING Tuesday is the most boaring day