Airline Flight Attendant

This was an email I received, I do not know the original source.
I marked this as hidden because I don't want anybody upset....I realize it's a bit off color, but I personally thought it was funny as hell.

The United Airline's passenger cabin was being served by an obviously gay flight attendant who seemed to put everyone into a good mood as he served them food and drinks. As the plane prepared to descend, he came swishing down the aisle in 1st Class and announced to the passengers, "Captain Marvey has asked me to announce that he'll be landing the big scary plane shortly, lovely people, so if you could just put up your trays that would be super." On his trip back up the aisle, he noticed that a well dressed, rather exotic looking Middle Eastern woman hadn't moved a muscle. "Perhaps you didn't hear me over those big brute engines. I asked you to raise your trazy-poo so the main man can pitty-pat us on the ground." She calmly turned her head and said, "In my country, I am called a princess. I take orders from no one." To which the flight attendant replied, without missing a beat, "Well, sweet-cheeks, in my country, I'm called a Queen, so I outrank you. Put the tray up, Bitch"

This is another story, whether it's true or not...

A male flight attendant was "deadheading" on a flight. His last name was Gaye. As he boarded the plane he noticed his assigned seat was taken so he sat down in another nearby.

One of the working flight attendents walked up to the passenger in Mr. Gaye's seat and asked if he was "Gaye." The passenger squirmed a little and turned flush and said "Well, yes. Why do you ask." The attendant said "You have to leave the plane, there's no room for you." The real Mr. Gaye stood up and said to the attendant " I apologize for the confusion, but I'm Gaye." The attendant really confused now said "Then you'll have to leave the plane."

Another passenger having heard the whole conversation jumped up and said "Well, hell I'm gay too and they can't throw us all of the plane!"

Here is a good DVD I picked up "The Aviary" a movie actually produced by a flight attendant (UAL I think)

Here is a review that came out (yesterday)
THE AVIARY (DVD) Available at
www.theaviarymovie.comwww.theaviarymovie.com
****Four Stars -Filmthreat Review
by David Templeton
(2005-11-24)
2005, Un-rated, 88 minutes, Fancy Films


For the most part, movies about pilots and flight attendants tend to make the life of an airline professional seem exciting and glamorous, with days spent in the air and nights spent in exotic places with beautiful people. In director Abe Levy’s ambitious "The Aviary"—a solid, engaging comedy-drama made with a great deal of craft and ingenuity—the airline industry has never seemed so unglamorous and ringed with boredom. Perhaps the most realistic film ever made about flight attendance (is that a word?), "The Aviary"—co-written with Levy by seasoned flight attendant Silver Tree—is steeped in the day-to-day details of serving the unpleasant public at 30,000 feet.

Summer Pozi (Lara Phillips) is a hard-working flight attendant whose entire world revolves around the sky: airports, airplanes, hotel rooms and apartments shared with other flight attendants. Even her dreams of love and romance are airline oriented: Summer believes she will be only be happy once she’s landed and married a full-fledged airline pilot. Ironically, she hates flying, despises being a flight attendant, and admits to everyone that she’ll be hanging up her flight bag the minute a pilot slips a ring on her finger. So committed to this pilot-marriage plan she seems to have forgotten the part about love, Summer Pozi has recently dumped a sweet guy who was devoted to her, just because he decided not to take his Airline pilot test. After being transferred to San Francisco, she starts all over, sizing up the pilots in search of the guy with a pilot’s license, all the while dealing with vengeful co-workers and clueless customers. Eventually, she meets the captain of her dreams (played by Ed’s Josh Randall), but when tragedy strikes, she finds herself rethinking the strategies she’s always lived by.

Remarkably well-filmed and cleverly shot, considering there was very little budget for airplane rental, many of the in-the-plane scenes and airport sequences were filmed guerilla style, with Levy sneaking a camera onto actual flights while his actors gave quick performances when no one was looking. To that end, "The Aviary"—with its birds-eye-view shots, on-location scenery of Paris, Hawaii and other locales—may be the best looking small-budget-guerilla-independent film to come along in years.

This film, already a word-of-mouth sensation within the airline industry, is available on a first-rate website: www.theaviarymovie.comwww.theaviarymovie.com