What if God Had Voice Mail ????
Hello friends just have a look and imagine..... if this is possible.. then ???? heheheheh
"What If God Had Voice Mail"
======================
what if God decided to install voice mail? Imagine
praying and hearing this........
Thank you for calling The Lord's House. Please select
from the following options:
Press 1 for GENERAL REQUESTS.
Press 2 for THANKSGIVING.
Press 3 for COMPLAINTS.
Press 4 for HEALING.
Press 5 for HELP WITH THE IRS.
Press 6 for RAIN or No RAIN.
Press 7 for MIRACLES.
Press 8 for LOTTERY WINNING NUMBERS.
Press 9 for ALL OTHER INQUIRIES OR JUST TO SAY "HI"
Press 0 to hear this menu again
What if God used the familiar excuse:
"I'm sorry, all the angels are helping other SINNERS
right now. Please stay on the line. Your call is
important to us and will be answered in this
millennium."
Can you imagine getting these kind of responses as you
call God in prayer:
If you would like to speak to Gabriel, press 11.
For Michael, press 22.
For a directory of the other Archangels, press 33.
If you would like to hear King David sing a Psalm
while you are holding, please press 55.
Then wait for the beep and enter the number of the
Psalm you wish to hear.
To find out if a loved one has been assigned to
heaven, press 62.
Enter his or her social security number, the press the
pound (#) key, enter his or her date of birth, then
press the
pound (#) key twice.
For answers to nagging questions about dinosaurs, the
age of the earth, where Noah's Ark is, Darwin, Hitler,
the Pope, abortion, and UFOs, please wait until you
arrive here, answers can only be understood from a
"heavenly perspective."
To reach Lucifer, press 666, and your call will be
automatically transferred. PLEASE be careful, your
receiver may become warm.
Our computers show that you have already called once
today. Please hang up and try tomorrow.
This office is closed for the weekend. Please call
again on Monday, after 9:30 A.M., but before 4:30 ACST
(Absolute Celestial Standard Time).
To order any religious material enter catalog number,
quantity, and a major credit card number plus
expiration date.
For emergencies, refer to your BIBLE.
intruder :D
