Installin wife

I recieved this piece of humor from a friend via e-mail and consider it worth sharing. I searched the site whether it has been posted before or not but did not come up with any result. So, apologies if it has been posted before.


To: Tech Support

Dear Sir,
Last year I upgraded my system from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and noticed that the new program began creating problems within the system processing and that took up a lot of space and valuable resources.

Wife 1.0 installs itself into all other programs and launches during system initialization, where it monitors all other system activity.

Applications such as Poker Night 2.3, Girlfriend 3.2 and Saturday Football 5.0 no longer run, crashing the entire system whenever selected :(

I cannot seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while running my other favorite applications. Whichever module or software I enter, only Wife 1.0 seems to run and nothing else.

I am thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but the uninstall from Wife 1.0 to Girlfriend 7.0 does not work on this program. Can you help me, please!!!


Thanks,
Smith



Reply

To: Smith


Dear Smith,


This is a very common problem men users of the Wife 1.0 software complain about but it is mostly due to a primary misconception of the software.

Many men upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 with the idea that Wife 1.0 is merely a UTILITIES & ENTERTAINMENT program.

Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and designed by its creator to run everything. It is unlikely you would be able to purge Wife 1.0 and still convert back to Girlfriend 7.0.

Hidden operating files within your system would cause Girlfriend 7.0 to emulate Wife 1.0 so nothing is gained. It is impossible to uninstall, delete, or purge the program files from the system once installed !!

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is not designed to do this. Some have tried to install Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife 2.0 but end up with more problems than the original system. Look in your manual under "Worries Invited For Ever (Wife 1.0)".

I recommend you keep Wife 1.0 and just deal with the situation. Having Wife 1.0 installed myself, I might also suggest you read the entire section regarding general partnership faults (GPFs).

You must assume all responsibility for faults and problems that might occur, regardless of their cause. The best course of action to solve this major IT problem of yours will be to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE.

In any case avoid excessive use of the Esc key because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the operating system will return to normal. The system will run smoothly as long as you take the blame for all the GPFs.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but very high maintenance.

Consider buying additional software to improve the performance of Wife 1.0. I recommend you to install the latest gift software like Flowers 2.1, Necklaces 3.2, and Chocolates 5.0.

note: Do not under any circumstances, install Secretary With Skirt 3.3. This is not a supported application; in fact it is a deadly virus for Wife 1.0 and is likely to cause irreversible damage to the operating system.


regards,

Admin.

LOL thats a grate one, where did u retreave that from??


Nightfalls_Girl

Assuming that's an actual email/mail/memo and an actual reply to it: it's great to know that there are still people with a sense of humor around. Sometimes my friends are the only people with a sense of humor that I run into on any given day.....so sad. Thanks for the laugh!

omfg that had me in fits of laughter. Love this part

Quote:

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You must assume all responsibility for faults and problems that might occur, regardless of their cause. The best course of action to solve this major IT problem of yours will be to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE.

In any case avoid excessive use of the Esc key because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the operating system will return to normal. The system will run smoothly as long as you take the blame for all the GPFs.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but very high maintenance.

---

P.S-> Sorry for the huuuuge thread bump, just had to post a reply as that is seriously got me the giggles. :rofl:

You didn't mention child process 1.0 or further releases 2.0 or which creates problems with high volume and needs to run with attention 9.0 and toys. 1.9. Toys program has a short license period and therefore constanly requires updating at sometimes very high cost. 90% of the time wife 1.0 will generate child processes so please don''t install it.

It is even funnier to see seven year old threads come back from the dead. :eek7:

You would almost think it is some kind of zombie invasion in the making...

Will it run on Windoze 7? and is there a Linux version?

:drink:

Don't think it's been upgraded you still need to have Dos and Xtree diskette's :)