Artificial Inteligence

Hah, then I shall have to build an insanely complex looking time machine with little whirly bits and old typewriter keys, and spinning old-style dials, which somehow still doesn't use any electricity, and go back in time to abduct the old guy with the Deloreon and hide him in a warehouse in the middle of nowhere with a complex structure that fills a big plastic room with water while a camera records his reactions.
Foiled by a time that apparently is concious and works to repair itself, I'll then go forwards thousands of years to rebuild the human race with a group of peaceful savages once the current civilisation is destroyed by parts of the moon falling.

I will send my sony aibo to protect the old man and take him to the same place as bin laden and saddam are hiding.(note : Will program aibo to kill both of them during stay)

while I am working on a perfect female for which I have the DNA plans for (See 5th Element)
I just need to work out where the blender plugs in first.

I will then send back a race of half breed "thing" from the addams family and face hugger from aliens to wipe out the whole human race other than me (I am in same place hiding during all this) (note: may leave greekgoddess alive to.)

I will then breed with the new perfect being to restart the human race and will repeat this cycle every so often to maintain a level of control over the human race.

I'll foil that plan by catching the thing/facehugger breed in a big metal box. I'll then send the box to mars to save mankind from the 'Ghost on Mars' abomination.

Meanwhile, I'll carefully capture any women who have been impregnated from the halfbreed. Ignoring everything we know about genetics, I'll pretend that the parasite has been carried in the women's genes and clone her, assuming that any half-alien monsters I create in this way will be safely controllable just cos I've engineered them.

Hah, Then I will use my special genetic engineering techniques to speed up human evolution and allow certain beings to develop mysterious mutant powers (See X-Men 2).

Note : there may be a delay before my army is ready as I'm told power struggles will happen at around the age of puberty.

I will then hack into a gibson super computer (The one with the nice 3d interface instead of a command line) and use it to steel oil tankers.

I will then save the mysterious program that I use to do all this on a floppy disk and stick it with some chewing gum to the back of the condom machine in the boys bogs.

I will then go and consult the old lady at the end of my street (The Oracle) and get her to make me coffee before I sail over in my big tanker with my band of merry mutants and kill your new controlable alien creation.

I will then carry on out a dashing plan to blow up the world using a secret government defence satelite that only uses 32 bit encryption. I will take control of it and shoot the core of the planet. (Note The password for this is chair) (See James Bond Golden Eye For Details)

I then need to collect my perfect being and possibly greekgoddess to help me kickstart the human race again all under my control.

Hah! I'll use a giant robotic maid complete with vacuum cleaner to suck up all of the water (stopping the tankers) and then spray it at the satellite (note to self, maid control password is 12345) (note to self... change password on luggage)
I'll then capture a bunch of sharks, attach laser beams to their heads, and use them in an improbable way to steal a nuclear missile, which I will then ship across country in a train, ignoring any large ex-navy-seal chefs or impeccably dressed english gentlemen I might see.
I'll then assemble the missile in a strange mysterious warehouse and set it up to fire at the gibson super computer while I send a band of impressive looking yet slow and inept mercenaries to abduct you, your Oracle, and your greekgoddess, and tie you all up in a room filled with useful items to escape with, or at a pinch even build a complete armoured vehicle, while I put your perfect being in a large room with lots of swords on the wall and expensive and breakable items lying around so I can gloat and explain my complete plan to her.

can we say INBREED ??

Fortunately I still have the plans for my base under the polar ice cap..
My hidden base will only be revieled when you guy's have melted all the ice and evaporated all the water!!

Be prepared..

Damn,
(Note to self : Tying greekgoddess up sounds like fun)

Then if this is the way of it I shal have to involve my father who has been working for the emperor on his deatch star. I will go and get training from a little green guy I know who talks in riddles because of the green stew he eats on his home planet (Note : Yoda is a junkie)

I will then fly to the moon surrounding the giant maids force field generator where I know an ambush lies. There I will befriend the small furry creatures there and destroy your force field generator and capture your general. My dad will then fly directly into your giant maid on a kind of suicide mission because he knows his life is just not worth it. (See Independance day)

I will then spot an asteroid heading straight for earth that no one else has noticed yet. NASA will send a crack team of hit ninja minors to destroy the asteroid but will only suceed in pissing it off and then it crashes into your house destroying it but seconds before I flew in through the window leaving behind my perfect partner and rescuing only the pre-bound greek goddess that I'm then going to take to casa mark_boyle2002 (Note : Dont untie her).

by the time all the water is gone and my hideout is reveiled all my evil giant squid will have been trained sufficiently to be able to exterminate all that opose my authority..

casa mark_boyle2012 (note the 10 year span) will be the first to be take out, luckily casa boile has a nice scenic ocean view (don't they all) so the squids can come in for the attack and sneak out with the godess

after that I'll worry about Wrayth

Luckily I have an amonia detector which will detect the giant squids approach to casa_mark_boyle2002. I will then deploy the lochness monster code name nessie to deal with the squid.

note: greekgoddess is still tied up during all of this and being kept in a cavern under casa boyle for the unique purpose of breeding.

Mwahahah ha ha

Breeding? Woah woah wait a minute...no no no no no...

I can't breed yet...I'm only 21!!!