Printable View
I am in also xmaddness... I have an uncle in the Legislature of Texas who may be able to help us with the way to write and introduce legislation, etc... I can not promise he will but I don't see him saying no either... I am well liked by Uncle Leo and Auntie Lou :D
AP Newsflash November 2005:
In a first test of the Security Specialists Protection Act, known as the Xmadness bill, members of the Cybercrime Investigative Services have surrounded the Microsoft headquarters after their failure to respond to numerous violations. Microsoft has barricaded their Redmond offices and sworn to hold off the "corrupt officials of an imperialistic conspiracy to restrain their rights to free trade." In a statement released earlier Microsoft officially denied that there were any security holes in their operating system. The evidence, however, appears overwhelming from the piles of documentation released by various Network Security specialists around the country.
Xmadness (whose full name and address can be found at Antionline), speaking on assurance of anonymity, said, "We have been trying to warn Microsoft for years. We have sent them information, posted on the boards, and tried to help them. Now that we have the law on our side maybe they will actually patch their software seriously."
Currently though it is a standoff between the CIS and M$. Bill Gates has warned that any attempt to break into the compound will be met with force, he has alluded to having something called a BFG but we have yet to find out what that means.
If you recall Microsoft fought the SSPA both politically and legally claiming that it was unnecessary. "At Microsoft security is our primary concern. Our new Operating System has no security flaws.", said Bill Gates, CEO of Microsoft, in response to questions as to why Microsoft opposed the SSPA. "This protection of hackers only furthers the danger of our software being broken into." Mr. Gates had no comment when asked how hackers could break into software with no security flaws. In an amazing turn of events it was found that a kindergarten student playing a game at school was able to download all of the credit card numbers and passwords used at a popular online banking site. Microsoft said it was a fluke and could not happen again. The game the child was playing has become the most popular download for the past five days. This event finally prompted the CIS to act.
More as this story breaks.
PLEASE NOTE: This story is ficticious, meant to be humorous, and.........OMG There is a M$ rep at my door, wonder what he wants
WE INTURUPT THIS THREAD FOR SOME BREAKING NEWS....
We have just learned that Linux Opeating systems (M$'s greatest competition) have been being downloaded by the millions in an attempt to secure the entire banking industry.
We have had no comments from any M$ officials as of yet. Redhat officials have released the following statement although, "We have been trying to tell the world that this was bound to happen. Perhaps once the banking and e-commerce industry stops their CEO's from taking M$'s perks, the worlds online customers can take a sigh of relief."
More to come as we are recieveing constant updates on this incredible victory for the public's safety.
We know return you to your regularly scheduled thread....
FAUX NEWS SERVICE-REDMOND CA
Faux News Service has learned that negotiations wiith M$ founder Bill Gates have failed. Gates stands by his statement that his popular operating system "is not a security risk." When authorities first attempted to bring the flaws in his OS to his attention Mr. Gates was quoted as saying, "what you call a flaw I call job security." When asked what he meant by that comment he said, "Imagine all the people I would have to let go if I put out a product that actually did all I said would."
Authorities have given Mr. Gates until 12 o'clock midnight (pacific time) to surrender peacefully. A security source who spoke on condition of anonimity said, "We are prepared to use force if nessesary... As a matter a lot of my boys want to use force."
Faux News Service will keep you up to date on this breaking story...
We now return you to the regular thread...
(This is fiction... Wishful thinking... Not real... ) :D