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well after reading such depressing stories.. and the uprising of child pornography busts on the net.. i would like some of u to read something..
I found this while i was surfing the NCJRS (National Criminal Justice Reference Service)
Parents and Parents-to-be... i suggest you read this...
Protecting Children in Cyberspace: The ICAC Task Force Program. 2/2002, NCJ 191213.
good suggestion, I also suggest running a hidden keylogger to watch what your children are doing...
You might not like what you find 70 % of the time.... but its better to find out bad things about your children then to have bad things happen to your children
Its just 1 step in the right direction..
Also checking the internet history after your children are off the computer is something id also suggest... you may find some distrubing sites they have visited...
Confronting your children is something you MUST do... Try not to make them feel weird about what they might have done... even try to relate urself to it.. (not in the American Pie father to son way though... that was just to funny)
Good Luck! and rember, you children may hate you for it... but a childs hate last as long as the sunset... and at least ull still have ur child in the end ;)
maybe im saying this because im not a parent yet, but going as far as putting a keylogger on your computer so you can watch what your children are doing?? i mean come on thats just total invasion of privacy, i think you should give your child his/her privacy, if you raise them right then they will come to you with more serious issues, if you dont trust them they will find other ways to hide something from you...... TRUST is the MOST important thing in ANY relationship even child/parent.....
I allways had trust from my parents and thats why my parents allways knew what i was doing, weather it was getting drunk, having sex or anyhting in between.... And they knew i was going to be responsible about it because it was responsible that i told them in the first place.
Im just really against tracking your kids every move.
I remember when I was younger, my dad installed surfwatch on our computer as soon as we were first connected to the internet. It turned into a game of seeing what kinds of sites my sister and I could get into w/out being blocked by the damn thing. I'll agree w/ DOME, and I've said it before myself: If my dad hadn't installed surfwatch, I probably never would have went to any of those sites in the first place. IT was just the young, rebellious idea that I was beating his system.
Trust is very important. After being on the recieveing end of such an untrusting parent, I can say that I would have no reason to install a keylogger on my PC without some concrete eveidence of needing to do so. Especially since you only get one side of the conversation/email/etc. A keylogger doesn't allow you to see what comes into the computer, only what goes out, and through the keyboard.
EDIT: There is a program out there that keeps an active log of all html and image files that are opened/recieved on the computer, even if the temp folder, cache, and history are deleted. I don't remember what it's called, but they market it towards parents who want to keep an eye on their kids.
hmm ill just keep logs for safety measures..
sort of trust and responsability.. hey guys..
oh an example.. what is the good of telling the childeren not to visit porno sites, when dad does..
or telling the kids not to spy on the neighbours, when mom and dad have the binoculars trained on the newly wed couple down the street.. (geez that was a warped example)..
can you trust someone who says "I realy trust you on the computer".. "I have just installed a key logger incase I am wrong.."
I love and protect my children, lead by example, explain why you feel/think something is wrong. sometimes be child like not childish.. (my daughter has said I should remember that).. oh yeh.. teach them it is ok to admitt when you are wrong....
And you are human, so are they..
geez is that a grey hair..
#8-)
Its not a question of trust, Its a question of understanding
If the computer is urs and not ur kids then u have a right to know EXACTLY what they do with it.... You should let them know that they are not allowed to do it!
Did you know it is not illegal in the US to set up a camcorder to tape inside someones window from any public area such as a lamp or street?
Did you know that places like SEARS can have 2 way mirrors and can atch you get changed just to be sure you do not steal from their store?
Did you know that there is no such thing as privacy ?
DONT do anything you do not want anyone to know about, because sooner or later someone will find out!
And i rather my kids think that i dont trust them then for them to give out their phone number # and have some 40 year old trying to make sexual advances twords them in any way shape or form!
I am 17 years old and i understand this..... So i think its about time the parents and children should too!
--NetSyN
I think that there should be a healthy level of trust and understanding. Trust between parents and children is a much debated issue, the question is, where can someone draw the line. I don't think necessarily that someone should install a keylogger to monitor usage, but instead, have the computer in a well frequented area, even put it in the living room, watch tv while your kids are using the internet and occasionally glance.
My grandparents raised me and were very strict, not much about the internet because they trusted I would know right from wrong by the examples I showed them with other things. I hated them growing up, but you know what, I'm going to do the same thing when I have children of my own.
People are overly concerned about children and the internet, in my opinion. I think we should worry more why young teenage girls are allowed to go out dressed like Britney Spears, looking whorish, and meeting guys that way, instead of who they may or may not be chatting with on MSN. Look at all the perverts that lurk in the mall. We trust our children to go there.
Porn? Before the internet there were magazines full of busty nude women, it's just as easy to have one of your older friends go buy one and look at it that way.
And my biggest one, before there was the internet, people who barely knew eachother corresponded by snail mail....some fell in love and met. We do the same thing on the net and it's frowned upon. I know more weirdos in my apartment building than at the chat I've frequented the last 5 years, and there are far more people who chat there.
I know one thing from growing up, I may have done a lot of things that I shouldn't have, and I usually got caught but my grandparents always trusted me, it may not have always been on the same level. I had to show that I was responsible before I gained certain levels of trust, but never ever violate the trust bond between parent and children....It ruins everything.
Teach your kids and trust them. And if they muddle it up along the way, reinforce the idea until it's there. Don't spy on them. You wouldn't want it done to you.
<rant>
Nowadays, my parents seem to spend the greater portion of their time trying to keep track of me - that is, spying on me, listening in on me, and snooping through my stuff - both on the computer and off of it.
They lie straight to my face, and tell me never to lie to them.
They're ****ing hypocrites who give me no privacy, and expect me to be a damned robot who does exactly what they tell me!
Parents out there who may be reading this: I have some advice for you! Be honest with your kids! Don't tell them not to look at porn and spend the whole damned night downloading it yourselves! Don't tell them how horrible being drunk is, and how you would never do it - ESPECIALLY WHILE YOU ARE DRUNK!
What I can't understand is how most parents don't realize that the same things that would make them angrier than they've ever been before make their kids angry too! We've got emotions too, you know! ARRGH!
I'm on my way to a convention this weekend with a bunch of my friends. We knew about it eight months ago, and all told our parents then.
One of my friends just got told, six days before the convention, that he can't go because he will miss his little sister's birthday.
Another word of advice, parents - DO NOT PICK FAVOURITES! This friend's little sister is doted on beyond anything I've ever seen before... Guess what, parents - you're not doing the kid any ****ing favours! When little Victoria reaches real life, she's going to discover that people don't do whatever you want, whenever you want it! Not that her parents understand that... God, it makes me sick when I see a child treated like God by their (her, usually) parents, especially when it means that they ignore their other child, or in this case, use him as a tool to cater to her desires!............................................................*puts head in hands* My god...
Oh, and speaking of Britney Spears... WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THAT WOMAN? I normally wouldn't say this, but someone really ought to just slap her and tell her that teaching young girls to sell things with their bodies is wrong... *incoherent scream of rage*... ok, calming down...
</rant>
SSJVegeta-Sei
Well its a great idea not to spy on them......then you find out that your little girl was pretending to be 20 and talking to men in lewd ways....or your son to. Now I think there has to be some control over what they can and cannot see. Its not just sex things either. Violence is a big problem as well.
The Anarchist cookbook a prime example....it teaches you to make bombs and various gasses. I am more worried about people learning these things then a teenage boy looking at women. There needs to be a better way to keep kids out of these situations. The priviate chats are quite dangerous.....even I got burned by someone. That got my contact from here(I kid you not) and then preceded to use the msn chat flaw on me and minor threats. I let the guy on my contact list because I figured he got it off here so it was cool. No chance...you need to be careful no matter what. (yes I installed the buffer lol)
So I say do what ever you need to do to insure your childs safty. Those who dont may end up wishing they did. It is better to be safe then sorry!~!!!
So long as you don't ensure your children's hatred.
SSJVegeta-Sei
Privacy? My kids get privacy when they're using the bathroom or changing their clothes. They get privacy when they have friends over and they want to go to their rooms and crank their boy-band crap...
But the computer and the Internet? No way. I run my systems at home like I run my systems at work. I know where they've been, what they did there and where they can't go.
Its a sorry fact of life. Kids meet "people" on the Internet. And though a lot of you won't admit it, that is part of the allure of the Internet. You can sign into a chatroom or online game (or AO) and become another person altogether - anonimity is somehow empowering.
Kids get ideas and information from the Internet that may not be entirely factual. There is information on the Internet (Anarchist's Cookbook, improvised munitions, warez...) that I don't want my kids to have access to. And I if they do get to it, I want to know so I can step in and prevent them from doing something they may regret for the rest of their lives or worse.
My kids know I love them and would die protecting them. They also know what behavior I expect from them while on the computer (and elsewhere). But I still check. Just like in the working world, policies and procedures cannot be enforced or infractions proven without some type of an auditing action.
How many times do we hear and see on the TV about teenagers who build 20-30 pipe bombs, steal firearms, dedicate their websites to stalking somebody, etc... and the parents claim they had no idea what was going on? Too many in my opinion. And I don't want to be one of them.
Sure the kids are going to resent it while they're kids, but when they get a chance to grow up and have kids of their own, they'll be thanking their parents for instilling and enforceing some values onto them that they now can pass along to their children.
</soapbox>
:-)
Yes kids need protected but I don't think a keylogger is the answer - maybe thats just cause I'm not a parent yet & no-one can say for certain how their views will change when its their own child but atm I think that education about such matters is better than snopping and then confronting them afterwards....
sitting your child down and teaching them about the kinds of dangers there are on the net and what they should be watching out for themselves.....yes ok certain sites should be blocked but you can't control who else comes into a teen chatroom - and that is where i believe the biggest danger is from.
v_Ln
my sentiments EXACTLY :)Quote:
Originally posted here by valhallen
Yes kids need protected but I don't think a keylogger is the answer - maybe thats just cause I'm not a parent yet & no-one can say for certain how their views will change when its their own child but atm I think that education about such matters is better than snopping and then confronting them afterwards....
sitting your child down and teaching them about the kinds of dangers there are on the net and what they should be watching out for themselves.....yes ok certain sites should be blocked but you can't control who else comes into a teen chatroom - and that is where i believe the biggest danger is from.
v_Ln
Sadly enuff... **** like ComputerCOP and Logs don't work because they usually know how to tamper with them unless you have password locks on them. I think Computer companies really need to focus on this issue more and need to have a Online Safety Guide that comes with every computer. Basically a parent's guide. That, to me, is a MUST!
I've been using a neat little filtering program named WE Blocker. It's free, password protected and has never let me down..I strongly recommend it for all those concerned parents.
If you're interested, you can download it here. Give it a try!
And no, this isn't spam...I'm not selling anything.
Are Filters REALLY the answer though? People can get though filters, we know that. Filters are a start but to me you need education too or it's not gonna work.Quote:
Originally posted here by Conf1rm3d_K1ll
I've been using a neat little filtering program named WE Blocker. It's free, password protected and has never let me down..I strongly recommend it for all those concerned parents.
If you're interested, you can download it here. Give it a try!
And no, this isn't spam...I'm not selling anything.
blah blah blah...sombody close this thread.
We have enough of the same in the thread titled "a really nasty case up here."
Actually, I think that's a good Idea....neg or somebody lock this one please :)Quote:
Originally posted here by Quad
blah blah blah...sombody close this thread.
We have enough of the same in the thread titled "a really nasty case up here."
I don't have kids yet, but when I do there banned from the internet. Just look at what the internet did to me.... :eek:
System_0verload
Lol... I'm going to make them barely be on it... I hate Pedofiles!!! lol
Quote:
Originally posted here by Quad
blah blah blah...sombody close this thread.
We have enough of the same in the thread titled "a really nasty case up here."
Who the hell are you??
If you don't like the thread, don't read it! Simple. I was just adding my two cents worth and pointing interested people towards a filter. If that bores you.....bad luck.
If your profile is true, you need to lay off crack...They say the come down is a real bitch.
If you aren't intrested in reading a thread, no one is forcing you to read it! Anyways, this issue needs to be talked about so please if you don't wanna read it, then dont!
well.. educating them is a good point.. but i would just use the logger as a safety precaution.. its like my contingency plan.. my plan b.. hehe
Logging files are good and stuff like that but like many say, "Kids are becomign smarter Computer Wise then their parents" Sadly my kid will NEVER be smarter than me at computers :)
I agree with many of the things said here and I also run my home network like my network at work. Only one computer mine has full access and all other are in the open as in no computers in the kids room. Extensive use of logs but not keyboard loggers, in short they know I can look at any given time at who, what, where and when sites chat are used. It is called parential supervision. Even adults out here can run into problems like my own passed away father that clicked and installed a adult for pay site charged to his phone bill. Guess thing is a computer now and the web is point and click and screen names the in thing as is chat. There is not any software out there that can replace parents looking at what the children do and from the Ad people to ISP's and software programers give a mound of tasks to secure their system and children that use them. Funny how every software license agreement absolves the producers os any liability, what would change is M$ were liable for their holes? Thir are people and corps thay prey upon all of this all of this went to hell with AOL, and M$ figuring out after 6 years how to connect their systems out here. End user agreements need to be clear and not absolve the creator of be responsabile for what they do. This will change only with laws consumer laws. Gonna go pester Raphlf next..like the Covar the Web is Un-safe at any speed!
While I agree we need to be a little paranoid, and vigilent with our childeren, and with these we as parents carry out our responsabilities as parents, and I have said (in effect) that I disagree with keyloggers etc.. different childeren and differnt personality types mean that sometimes you may need to resort to methods that you normaly not rationalise as fair or reasonable.. ie keyloggers, chastity belts...
looking at my own situation, perhaps I am as bad as someone who would place a keylogger on a child computer.. I have a dedicated computer/study room, the homework, computer entertainment etc is carried out here.. so We can keep an eye on the childerens internet activity,oh and they on ours.. in some cases it has had to be give and take...
Yes my comments come from the situation of not having to need to.. ok I am fortunate I suspect...
We just don't live in an ideal world.. well if it was for me, it would be hell for others..
I hope this didn't seem to contradict my earlier post.. but to clarrify and balance some statements
Cheers
I'd have to say that if you want to 'protect' your kids from the evil Internet, the best way to do that is to keep the computer locked down unless you're monitoring it while they're on it. Buy a router, password protect it, and set up times when they can and can't use it. Password protect or even better, get the program that 'freezes' your computer so that nothing can be installed onto it and can be restored back to a point in time. I don't know about going to the keylogging event because that's really privacy-intrusive and God knows, there's enough of that as it is with parents who try to be active in their kids lives.
I'd just tell my kids (if I had any) this: "I see everything you do on there, I know all. I read the logs daily". For all they know, I could be completely full of crap, but if it's a linux based system, hehe....not a joke there, you can log everything and send the log to a remote machine, hence they can't edit anything, not that they could to begin with.
That's another thing, forget windows. Get linux and work on the security side of it. You can get logs, permissions are already pretty good for beginning users and since all they want to do is browse and email and ICQ/AIM, there you go...just by being linux, they can't use win32 apps and that'll save on viruses/trojans/etc...
hmm ok.. here's my game plan..
if i have a kidd under 18.. here's what i'll do
1) install Internet Nanny...
2) Have the computer in a common room.. (i may have a computer in my Computer room but thats restricted access and only I can use it)
3) my computer is networked to the Kid's computer.
4) i will use loggers...
5) my kidd will have HALF of the password for the logger and ill have the other HALF.. that way my kid will feel asured that i will not invade his privacy w/o him/her knowing about it. coz i will need his other half of the password to open the logs.
6) plan B.. my computer is the server and i will install packet annalyzers and softwares that logs whatever my kid is doing.. and w/o him/her knowing about it.
Sonic....this sounds like the best plan I've seen yet :)Quote:
Originally posted here by s0nIc
hmm ok.. here's my game plan..
if i have a kidd under 18.. here's what i'll do
1) install Internet Nanny...
2) Have the computer in a common room.. (i may have a computer in my Computer room but thats restricted access and only I can use it)
3) my computer is networked to the Kid's computer.
4) i will use loggers...
5) my kidd will have HALF of the password for the logger and ill have the other HALF.. that way my kid will feel asured that i will not invade his privacy w/o him/her knowing about it. coz i will need his other half of the password to open the logs.
6) plan B.. my computer is the server and i will install packet annalyzers and softwares that logs whatever my kid is doing.. and w/o him/her knowing about it.
It doesn't sound like most of you are parents or have older teens.Quote:
Originally posted here by s0nIc
1) install Internet Nanny...
2) Have the computer in a common room.. (i may have a computer in my Computer room but thats restricted access and only I can use it)
3) my computer is networked to the Kid's computer.
4) i will use loggers...
5) my kidd will have HALF of the password for the logger and ill have the other HALF.. that way my kid will feel asured that i will not invade his privacy w/o him/her knowing about it. coz i will need his other half of the password to open the logs.
6) plan B.. my computer is the server and i will install packet annalyzers and softwares that logs whatever my kid is doing.. and w/o him/her knowing about it.
1. Tried it. Son found a way around it.
2. Doesn't work. They both need to do homework, play games, play music, use AIM and I would like to get on some times.
3. Agree
4. Agree
5. Good Idea, empowers the kids. I have to think this through more
6. Kind of reverses 5 (i know it's plan B)
Quote:
Originally posted here by Conf1rm3d_K1ll
Who the hell are you??
If you don't like the thread, don't read it! Simple. I was just adding my two cents worth and pointing interested people towards a filter. If that bores you.....bad luck.
If your profile is true, you need to lay off crack...They say the come down is a real bitch.
Who am I? Hahahaha, I am your daddy bitch. Remember that ****. What you posted doesnt bore me, this whole thread does. There is one just like it two links down. Why do we need two of the same?
if my profile is true...heh...god your even stupider than you look. About the come down I wouldn't know, but ask your mommy, she's my number 1 buyer.
Suggestion: change your nick to Conf1rm3d_dumbAss....
ciao cheesedick,
- Captain Quad
Wow! How nasty! Ya better tone it down a bit, fat boy (lay off the hamburgers, dude). There's no need to behave like that. You could of pm'ed me that garbage and spared everyone else.
Fat boy? Interesting assupmtion you've made. Glad you enjoyed my reply.