gore, whizkid anyone reply FAST

hey i need a two page story for english ... and i know gore and whizkid and zombieman are smart and know how to create funny , BLODDY, stories. so anyone if you could do me a favor and write something for me or if you do not want to write the whole 2 page story just give me the beginnign but if you want to go crazy ...i need a story how the HACKER came to be ... how god created the hacker first ..then the black hat and the white hat and they got into a fight and the one killed the other so if you could make it bloody and nasty and funny i would appriciate it with some greenies :) ...tx everyone...

Isn't that cheating MemorY?

no :) .. i just want some ideas how to beginn the paper ..if ya'll have some ideas just type like a paragraph or two to begin ...i do not have any ideas how to begin this ....

Ok give me a sec. I will see what I can come up with.
Damn, dude you should of just AIMed me I would of been able to reply to you faster.

I will be back in like five with the Start.

Stay tuned for the adventures of "Whizkid to the rescue" Starring Whizkid

Can he help save the day?
Can he help memory get a A??

Stay tuned.

In the beggining they tell you that it was Adam and Eve. But that is not true in the real beginning it was just me. Who am I? Well I am what you call a Hacker. Yeah you think that Computers have been around for a short amount of time, no they have been around for millions of years God just took them away. He feared that Humans couldn't handle them.

Well I guess I got you wondering what the hell I am talking about.

So let me take you back to the beginning.


In the beginning there was (You guessed it) Me. The hacker. My job was to make sure that all computers were good. Everywhere, God surely loved his. Mac, so it was my job to make sure that it was secure. God made me to make sure that everything was good.

But then one day, God called me into his office. Hacker, I have a job for you. The devil is trying to get into my system. I need you to continue. Taking care of my system and making it work great but you also have a new Job. To take out, "All Black Hat's".

I for sure was amazed what was a black hat. Well God explained to me. A black hat, my son is you, but with different motives. A black hat's job is to get into My computer and put Virus's, Trojan's and other things on my system. The devil created this Creature to destroy my computer. I need you to defend against him.

So you know I am stoked. God gave me another job. **** is was boring sitting all day trying to upgrade software, and fix Hardware. I mean come on God loved his damn. "CS" He played that game to death.

___________________________________________________________________________

Ok that is the Break it is a good start if you want I can continue let me know.

:rofl: Maybe you should edit out the cursing.

Oh, sorry Anyone that has been on IRC with me knows I don't have the Cleanest mouth. But yeah I will fix the Cussing if he likes it. Hey Memory if you like if I can finish it tonight and post it in here by no later then 6-7 just enough time for me to get home from work and finish writing it.

Shouldn't take me that long I type pretty fast.

hey whizkid thank you very much but i printed it out and showed it to my teacher ..she said i can't write about a hacker ,.... the theme of the sotry is to tell how a animal got created ..go figure.... like in the story animals can talk and maybe they are human and they did something wrong and someone turned them into an animal ,something funny ..or if you would like how two animals got born and fought like "good" and "evil" representing god and the devil ....or two brothers or just people but it has to have some kind of explaination to some Nature event or write how an animal got his name or how tornados occur ..but not the real reason..something imaginary ...if it is a lot of work for you i'll try and find something to get me started ....damn english teacher what kind of a stupid theme is that ...

edit: any nature, animal, religious event or something ....:) tx

The teachers I like best are those who let you choose controversial topics to write about. Maybe your teacher has an animal/nature fetish?! :D

Sounds like an attempt to plagerize to me :D

Actually we are learning Native American Literature and we read a few stories how native Americans used "imaginary" stories involving some "coyote" and animals to explain natural happenings and animals names and stuff ...so she said we have to write a that kind-of "Myth"..

Hum....

This should be a bit of a Challenge. I think I will take it. I like Challenges.

So where do I start.


Ok I am going to give you a quick paragraph for both. The religious way and the Non-Religious way.

Oh and as for Plagirism. Man you can have anything that I write. The only thing that I ask is that you let me know what you thought about it.

Ok....
Here goes nothing.

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Well you know the about Beginning don't you? I guess you know what you were told. Never looked outside the box did you? So sad, I swear. It is so sad. How can you say that you know anything if you don't even know the Beginning. Well let me tell you then.

Long Long ago there were 2 friends. Tom and Tim, they were the best of friends. But there was one thing that keep them apart. There beliefs. See Tom was a Henajuan.

Henajuan- A religion that believes that they are god's Children and have all his Powers because of that.

Well see Tim was a Majeuan.

(DONT EXPECT ME TO KEEP SPELLING THOSE RIGHT.):)

Majeuan-A religion that there is no god, and that they are there on god's and they have there power's because they are god's themselves.

Well like I said besides that, they were best friends. They did everything together, Mooned there teachers. Raised Females Underwear up a Flag pole. Everything, they even had there first kiss together. (Tis Tis Such a bad Thought Process) They were dating 2 girls and they both kissed the girls on the same day at the same time.

Well time goes on, and as part of this Culture is Custum for the Henajuan, and the Majeuan. To every year have a feast. Well this one year they have the feast, and Tom and Tim were there together as usual. Well the feast was going over excellent. Towards the end of the feast there was this stranger to both Religions/Tribes walked into the Village. Slowly walking, as if this person had nothing to do, no care in the world.

Well this Stranger walked into the village, and came to the Center circle where everyone was at. And removed it's hood. Low and Behold it is a beuatiful girl. This girl is Gorgeous. I mean Damn. So she begins to speak, but noone can here her. So it's get's quieter everyone that was talking previously quiets down. And this women speaks again. This time people can here her but barely. She says "I want the 2 that are closest from both villages". So a Husband and Wife stand.

The woman shakes her head. "No"

She says again "I want the 2 closest from both villages"

This time a 2 brothers stand up.

Again the woman shakes her head "No".

She again says "I want the 2 closest from both villages"

This time Tom and Tim look at each other and realize she is talking about them. So they stand.

She finally Shakes here head yes.

Yes, "My children you are Correct you are the Closest among this group".

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Ok that is what I got so far. Instead of finishing it. I will let you say what you think. I got one more thought about this, on how to do it. I have one more idea on how to do it. If you like that one. Let me know and I will Finish.

funniest story have heard about the creation of an animal is in terry pratchetts book lost continent

Quote:

---

'Now look,' said Ridcully. 'I'm a man who knows his ducks, and what you've got there is laughable.'"

It's been said, cruelly, that a platypus is what a duck would look like if it was designed by a committee.

---

taken from -> http://www.co.uk.lspace.org/books/ap...continent.html

basically a group of wizards are standing round trying to draw a duck and not having much luck but they dont realise that they are drawing with the tools of a god who is busy building and populating the new continent with animals - so whatever they draw comes to life.
Explaining the weird appearnce of the duck billed platapus

v_Ln