Pandering to the lowest common denominator

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DETROIT - The sign on the toilet brush says it best: "Do not use for personal hygiene."

That admonition was the winner of an anti-lawsuit group's contest for the wackiest consumer warning label of the year.

The sponsor, Michigan Lawsuit Abuse Watch, says the goal is "to reveal how lawsuits, and concern about lawsuits, have created a need for common sense warnings on products."

The $500 first prize went to Ed Gyetvai, of Oldcastle, Ontario, who submitted the toilet-brush label. A $250 second prize went to Matt Johnson, of Naperville, Ill., for a label on a children's scooter that said, "This product moves when used."

A $100 third prize went to Ann Marie Taylor, of Camden, S.C., who submitted a warning from a digital thermometer that said, "Once used rectally, the thermometer should not be used orally."

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Source

Does anyone except the terminally frigging stupid need these warnings?

Yes. The companies that make these products because if they don't they'll be sued until they go bankrupt.

Remember, coffee is hot.

But as the joke goes, if we just removed all the warning labels, stupidity would be eliminated. Rinkworks has a nice collection of them here. For those unaware, Rinkworks is more well known (to me, at least) for Computer Stupidities

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A $100 third prize went to Ann Marie Taylor, of Camden, S.C., who submitted a warning from a digital thermometer that said, "Once used rectally, the thermometer should not be used orally.

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I hope they didn't get a complaint before they put that one on.

Sometimes on children's medicine you get the 'do not drive or operate heavy equipment' warning.

Dear Teacher.
Please don't let Johnny play Tonka trucks at recess. He has a jag on.

Signed Epstein's mother

Kinda makes you wonder about the label on Sun Light dish detergent (the original lemony kind) - Do NOT Eat!

Alas, stupidity should be painful. These warning labels are well out of hand, and unfortunately for us, our legal system won't help in stopping it anytime soon.

"Warning: choking hazard"

"Contents Hot"

"Remove wrapper before eating"

"Ambian" sleeping pill, warnings: "May cause drowsiness"

Warning on my curling iron: "Do not use internally"

I'm sorry, but that one just made me say What. The. F***.

Who would stick that inside themselves? And for what ungodly reason? :eek:

Wet joy stick comes to mind.

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Wet joy stick comes to mind.

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Oh, ow!

Shocking.

But...but...it's hot :(

Only if it is plugged in!!!!!

visualization comes into play here!

Speaking of eyes...

This is on my can of spray paint....

"Do not spray in face"

Check your bottle of Raid Bug Killer...it says the same thing.

/me pictures some poor idiot calling poison control, cause he's sprayed his face full of bug poison....

On a towel:

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This towel has been tested to withstand significantly strong winds. But please be advised that during a hurricane or other severe weather conditions, this product should not be used to secure yourself or anything of value.

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Ok... :rolleyes:

Darwinism at its best. what else can be said?

O.K. Just had a user call stating they needed help updating online tax information for Florida.

I went to the site - typed in the ID and presses the make changes button.

I was then given a pdf form.

After a little confusion I called the tech support # which was answered with a simple "hello"

I confirmed that I had called the correct # and that the way to make the changes was to print the pdf and fax.

That's how the Florida tax folks do online updates.

Kinda of off subject but what a worthless update button!

Why not just remove the warning labels on everything? Here in Michigan was where the lady sued the Mcdonalds because the coffee was hot and she burned her vagina when it got on her. She was driving with it netween her legs and of course it got on her and she sued.

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She was driving with it netween her legs and of course it got on her and she sued.

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Over here if she was driving with a drink in her lap, the chances are the police would prossecuted for driving with undue care attention. There have been cases where drivers have been nicked for something as trivial as taking a bite of a Kit Kat. :o

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Originally posted here by gore
Why not just remove the warning labels on everything? Here in Michigan was where the lady sued the Mcdonalds because the coffee was hot and she burned her vagina when it got on her. She was driving with it netween her legs and of course it got on her and she sued.

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We may not be talking about the same case, but if we are then please read up on the case.

(http://www.lectlaw.com/files/cur78.htm) (http://www.centerjd.org/free/mythbus..._mcdonalds.htm)

McDonalds was at fault for heating their coffee up to extreme temps and admitted its coffee was unfit to drink when first bought.

Anyway, the woman originally sued for around 20k (for her medical treatment) but McDonalds did not want to pay it.

The final court settlement was for $160k but they settled out of court.

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McDonalds was at fault for heating their coffee up to extreme temps and admitted its coffee was unfit to drink when first bought.

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Ahhhhhh..... C'mon..... Let's examine that statement and apply just the "teeniest" bit of logic to it!!!!

The recipe for coffee: Take boiling water and pour it through ground coffee beans in a filter to prevent the "bits" but to allow the solute to pass through with the flavor.

The boiling point of water: The boiling point of water is 100 degrees Centigrade, (212 fahrenheit, IIRC.... but it's been a while....)

Effect of applying boiling water to human flesh: Usually results in scalding or 2nd degree burns _if_ the application cannot be immediately cooled by the application of a fluid that's temperature tends to freezing.... (Zero degrees Centigrade)

The chances of having a cooling fluid avalable in your vehicle: Next to none if you are in motion, still next to none if you are parked.

The chances of spilling a fluid in a container while driving in traffic: Quite high considering the various accelerations and decelerations that take place during the act of non-highway driving.

Conclusion: If you don't understand the recipe for coffee, you don't understand the physics of heat or you don't understand the physics of motion don't blame anyone else for your lack of understanding of any one of the above when you screw up and get hurt.... It's _you_ that's stupid.... not the company that follows the recipe for coffee.

That's Fair and Just.....

I thought the case was about the problem of not putting the lid on right?

On a coffee cup:

C A U T I O N: Contents hot.

Good thing they put that there, I may confuse it with Ice water.

ladies and gentleman i present you the american dream - being able to sue anyone for anything. ie capitalism.

I DON'T LIKE THE WAY YOU SAID THAT! I'LL SEE YOU IN COURT BITCH!

lmfao

Man You just can't win Erok. I take offense to the 'f' in the above statement, but was at the same time vaguely aroused. These being the grounds for sexual harassment, I intend to sue you for same. You'll hear from my attorney :D

Coffee..Bah!! If you want to hear something really stupid...how about that guy who sued ( Starbucks...or...was it Denny's ) because his pecker got slammed by the lid on one of their toilets...apparently as he was trying to sit the lid came up and...well you can guess from there.
He won!!!
Claimed the seat was not properly tightened and moved as he sat down. :rolleyes: