Computers BLOWN up ?

[Ron the don]

I'm having some computer problems, can you help?

Eighteen months ago I upgraded to Girlfriend 1.0 from Drinking Mates
4.2, which I'd used for many years without any trouble. However, there
are apparently conflicts between these two products and the only
solution was to try and run Girlfriend 1.0 with the sound off. To make
matters worse, Girlfriend 1.0 is also incompatible with several other
applications, such as Lads Night Out 3.1, Football 2.0 and Playboy 6.1.

Successive versions of Girlfriend proved no better. A shareware
beta-programme, Party Girl 2.1 which I tried had many bugs and left a
virus in my system, forcing me to shut down completely for several
weeks. Eventually I tried to run Girlfriend 1.2 and Girlfriend 1.0 at
the same time, only to discover that when these two systems detected
each other they caused severe damage to my hardware.

Sensing a way out, I then upgraded to Fiancée 1.0 only to discover that
this product soon had to be upgraded (at great cost) to Wife 1.0, which
I reluctantly agreed to because, whilst Wife 1.0 tends to use up all
my available resources, it does come bundled with FreeSex Plus and
Cleanhouse 2002.

Shortly after this however I then discovered that Wife 1.0 can be very
unstable and costly to run; For example, any mistakes I made were
automatically stored in Wife 1.0's memory and could not be deleted.
They then resurfaced months later when I had forgot about them. Wife
1.0 also has an automatic Diary Explorer and E-Mail pornfilter and can,
without warning, launch Photostrop and Whingezip! These latter products
have no help files and I have to try and guess what the problem is
myself.

Additional costly problems are that Wife 1.0 needs updating regularly,
requiring Shoe Shop Browser for new attachments and also Hairstyle
Express which needs to be reinstalled every other week. Wife 1.0 also
spawns unwelcome child processes that also drains my resources; It also
conflicted with some of the new games I wanted to try, stating that
they are an illegal operation.

When Wife 1.0 attaches itself to my Audi TT programme it often crashes
or runs the system dry. Wife 1.0 also has a rather annoying pop-up
called Mother-in-Law, which can't be turned off. Recently I've
attempted to try Mistress 2002, but there could be problems, a friend
has alerted me to the fact that if Wife 1.0 detects the presence of
Mistress 2002 it tends to delete all my MSMoney files before
un-installing itself.


Any Ideas?

[hot_ice]

HEHE - that's hilarious stuff. I remember getting an e-mail similar to this ages ago, but it's just a crack up everytime!! Isn't it all true?? hehe - I love it.

Greg

[Vorlin]

ROFL that's some funny ass ****...too true, too true..

[zigar]

Wife 1.0 tends to use up all
my available resources, it does come bundled with FreeSex Plus and
Cleanhouse 2002.

be aware that's only if you get Wife 1.0 PRO...

Wife 1.0 LITE has all of the same features as PRO but after 3 months it has some functionality disabled.

for example....FreeSex Plus only operates once per month

Cleanhouse 2002 is an add on i've never been able to get to work...seems it's incompatible with my version of Wife 1.0 so i can't evaluate it's performance..

[Maverick811]

Now that's just hilarious. I unfortunately have experienced a good portion of that

[VictorKaum]

Originally posted by zigar


be aware that's only if you get Wife 1.0 PRO...

Wife 1.0 LITE has all of the same features as PRO but after 3 months it has some functionality disabled.

for example....FreeSex Plus only operates once per month

Cleanhouse 2002 is an add on i've never been able to get to work...seems it's incompatible with my version of Wife 1.0 so i can't evaluate it's performance..

Other versions of Wife 1.0 LITE only operate FreeSex Plus at full capacity when Husband 1.0 with the AlwaysWantSex add-in performs well enough to use all the functionality of FreeSex Plus.

[Ron the don]

My system has now crashed, gone under, caput, finito, game over, topsee turvee, blam, shot to ****, fookski.

Thanks alot

hehe

[Ouroboros]

FORMAT...FORMAT...FORMAT!

Ouroboros

[Kewl_Zero]

The only comment I could add, Ron, was that these were all run on a Microsoft OS? *sigh*

[mrleachy]

heres a site with a pile of stuff thats similar to this Wife 1.0 thingy
www.annoyances.org
go to the humour section and they have a few similar things