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Thread: How to fake being sick TUTORIAL

  1. #1
    Senior Member
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    Post How to fake being sick TUTORIAL

    Wanna have more net time but you have school?
    Wanna get out of going to some stupid thing and have free time?

    Well here you go school kiddys The only tutorial i could find about fakeing sickness well

    HIGH TEMPERATURE:
    This is THE most important step in faking sick. With this ability almost any normal (or abnormal) mother can be convinced that you have a cold. If your mother feels your forehead you can: Just rub your hand quickly back and forth across you forehead, the friction will heat your forehead up, and fool your mom. Get a hot washcloth and hold it to your forehead, don't make it too hot or your mother will think you are on fire. If your mother uses a thermometer: Rub the thermometer between your hands causing friction again and giving a false reading. Hold the thermometer near a lightbulb (75 watt) for a shot time. Put the thermometer under your electric blanket or heating pad. Lastly, if your mom watches you while she is taking your temperature; drink a glass of very hot water beforehand and it will raise your mouth temperature.

    NOTE: Do not raise your temperature too high or it will be obvious you are a fake, or a doctor will be called.

    NAUSEA:
    For the serious faker nausea is a good weapon. This will guarantee that you stay home. To pretend you threw up pour a can of Turtle Soup (or any other kind) into the toilet. (Remember the soup should resemble your last meal). Also, make your breath smell bad. This is either natural, or you can eat some of the soup before pouring it in the toilet. If the above fails look at yourself in the mirror and the effects will be quite real.

    DIARRHEA:
    Faking the runs is easy. Use the same procedure as for nausea but use Chunky Beef Soup and don't worry about breath. If this fails eat a cheese sandwich, hot-fudge sundae, sauerkraut, and a little mayo. Guaranteed results.

    RUNNY NOSE AND SNEEZING:
    Simple, just wad up and wet some tissue and put it by your bed. For the real thing just sniff some pepper, and a little garlic. The effects will be quite real, and they may persist. You are probably a little stuffy headed anyway so don't sweat it (Although sweat is good for faking a cold).

    COUGHING:
    Oh come on, anyone with half a brain knows how to fake coughing. If you don't just close your throat and exhale.

    MENTAL TECHNIQUES:
    Make you mom think you are sick by looking unappealing. Pretend that you are dizzy and you are really hurting. In general make your parent fell guilty about making you go to school or wherever. Remember it hurts them more than it hurts you. Oh, don't get better too soon either or your parent will know there is a scam going on. Once, you have your parents convinced you have them at your will, make them fix meals for you and do all kinds of things (Remember they're on a guilt trip).


    This ought to be enough to give you a good start on the idea of faking illnesses. So, when you get these ideas down start making up your own, as they say "Necessity is the mother of invention."


    Source

    This post has wasted 3199 chars of space on AntiOnline --NetSyN
    [shadow]i have a herd of 1337 sheep[/shadow]
    Worth should be judged on quality... Not apperance... Anyone can sell you **** inside a pretty box.. The only real gift then is the box..

  2. #2
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    lol nice1.
    Ey can you write your real name pls?
    \"My name is Overlord!\"
    ph34r starcract-nerds!

  3. #3
    AntiOnline Senior Member souleman's Avatar
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    I can't believe you actually posted this in the tutorials form???????
    \"Ignorance is bliss....
    but only for your enemy\"
    -- souleman

  4. #4
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    i thought it was a funny concept so if you have nothing nice to say... well you know the rest

    Update : Looks like im getting negs for this post for no reason so i thought id give u a reason..

    Your a stupid ass that gives negs for no reason because u feel that it will accually effect me in any way then make me think of how stupid you truely are

    --NetSyN
    [shadow]i have a herd of 1337 sheep[/shadow]
    Worth should be judged on quality... Not apperance... Anyone can sell you **** inside a pretty box.. The only real gift then is the box..

  5. #5
    Senior Member
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    lol juste fake a headache
    hip hop rules

  6. #6
    once in the service I had a severe hangover and I knew that was no excuse to not run or go to work so I swipped up some dust and poked my eye. The doctor gave me three days off and some drops he called it pink eye.
    Integrity...loyalty.....and the willingness to make a better world for us all.

  7. #7

    Talking

    is there a doctor in the house

  8. #8
    why would you bring up negative points if it didnt bother you? I could make hundreds of posts like this and get my post #'s waaay up but I'd rather wait until something worthwile comes about or If I have a good question.

  9. #9
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    something to help you escape those tests and exams. good stuff NetSyn.

  10. #10
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    I use mosy of these tricks often. But not with my mom . with my boss. When i come in the next day after calling in sick i try to make my face all red before i go see him and then i act all icky and often when sitting hold up my head with my arm, Appears to work nicly ,,,so far
    Violence breeds violence
    we need a world court
    not a republican with his hands covered in oil and military hardware lecturing us on world security!

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