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May 16th, 2003, 02:58 AM
#1
Signs of bein too drunk
Signs That You Are Too Drunk
You lose arguments with inanimate objects.
You have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling off the earth.
Job interfering with your drinking.
Your doctor finds traces of blood in your alcohol stream.
Career won't progress beyond Senator from Massachusetts.
The back of your head keeps getting hit by the toilet seat.
Sincerely believe alcohol to be the elusive 5th food group.
24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case - coincidence?? - I think not!
Two hands and just one mouth... - now THAT'S a drinking problem!
You can focus better with one eye closed.
The parking lot seems to have moved while you were in the bar.
You fall off the floor...
Your twin sons are named Barley and Hops.
Hey, 5 beers has just as many calories as a burger, screw dinner!
Mosquitoes catch a buzz after attacking you
At AA meetings you begin: "Hi, my name is... uh..."
Your idea of cutting back is less salt.
You wake up in the bedroom, your underwear is in the bathroom, you fell asleep clothed. - hmm.
The whole bar says 'Hi' when you come in...
You think the Four Basic Food Groups are Caffeine, Nicotine, Alcohol, and [Women or Men].
Every night you're beginning to find your roommate's cat more and more attractive.
Roseanne looks good.
Don't recognize wife unless seen through bottom of glass.
That damned pink elephant followed me home again.
Senators Kennedy and Packwood shake their heads when they walk past you.
I'm as jober as a sudge.
The shrubbery's drunk from too frequent watering.
You wake up screaming "TORO TORO TORO!" in the middle of the night.
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May 16th, 2003, 03:08 AM
#2
Hey Everyone,
Rofl.... Great post TwistedSnyper.... Going to print this and put it on my funny people wall...lol.. keep up the good work!!!!!!!!
Cya
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May 16th, 2003, 05:34 AM
#3
LOL .... nice job Twisted ....
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May 18th, 2003, 04:03 AM
#4
Thx man took me a while to think of shyt to say to put on there. I like my ending result. -Twisted-
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May 19th, 2003, 10:35 PM
#5
You have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling off the earth.
Damn...I feel that way right now...
Because I am a woman, I must make unusual efforts to succeed. If I fail, no one will say, "She doesn't have what it takes"; They will say, "Women don't have what it takes".
Clare Boothe Luce
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May 19th, 2003, 10:44 PM
#6
Banned
cool. Keep it up Twisted.
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May 20th, 2003, 12:41 AM
#7
Your doctor finds traces of blood in your alcohol stream.
Thats good..
And to think i used to watch that show, and actually liked it.
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May 22nd, 2003, 01:48 PM
#8
You fall off the floor...
*ROFL* Very Good joke Twisted. Bt fel out of my chair laughing when i read it
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May 22nd, 2003, 02:16 PM
#9
ummm, evil are you pretending to not be snyper??
AIM: TwistedSnyper
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