New Programming Language

[dinowuff]

This is not mine, however, a good representation of life here in corporate america.

MEMO:

The lack of decent project management has allowed me to incorporate the Bogus Language for the development of our project management software.

Due to the lack of any sort of written documentation for the Bogus Language, this Memo will be an incomplete attempt at a manual for the Bogus Programming Language.

Bogus is an interpreted language. More precisely, Bogus source code is dynamically misinterpreted and any words that look like English in the resulting byte code are naively transliterated into Ebonics and discarded. The JTL, or just-to-late misinterperter can be invoked interactively. Or uninteractively. Garbage collection in Bogus is load balanced and distributed so everybody gets their fair share of garbage.

Bogus is strongly dynamically typed. Weak, slow typing results in strings like aaaaaaaaaaaaaa and klklklklklklklkl.

Whitespace in Bogus must be respected and feared. Coming from a language where whitespace is ignored you probably will never really understand Bogus; but understanding was not one of Bogus's design goals. A good rule of thumb is that whitespace in Bogus has the opposite meaning from the meaning it has in any other language. For example indentation is used to denote language elements. Thus:

if condition
statement 1
Statement 2
statement 3

means to add 1 and 2 and get result 3. Indentation by five spaces is the addition operator, which is overloaded, and reverse Polish. Two more Bogus operators can be combined via the Union Operator, but then they will go out on strike and you won't get anything done.

The actual words in the code (if, condition, statement) are ignored; English words are used to provide a misleading feeling of familiarity. The repetition of these words; however, are important. By inserting the same word before each of the numbers to be added and before the number in the last line, we are indicating that we wish to bind that number to that sum. In this case the sum is 3 and the bound value is coincidently, also 3. Bogus gives the programmer a great deal of freedom in this respect. If you want to make the sum of 1 and 2 be 18, it's all you.

Literal strings in Bogus are represented as a series of back space characters (ASCII 8); A is a series of 65 backspaces, and so on. A multicharacter string is a series of backspaces, explicitly combined with the concatenation operator. The concatenation operator is 23 (forward) spaces so when the misinterperter is reading a long string, it whips back and forth like a disk-drive head being tested to destruction.

Variables in Bogus are not explicitly declared. Numeric variables come into existence according to the value of the internal clock. The variable 1 came into existence on 12:00:00:01 am January 1, 1904; 2 came into existence one millisecond later; and so on. IF you try to use a variable before it exists, the results are unpredictable.

Control Structures are represented by nonEnglish words. A pair of French words denote the beginning and end of a conditional, three Russian words and a numeric constant delineate a repetitive structure.

Blocks start with a phrase in Cockney rhyming slang and end with the name of a British Rugby team.

New classes are created with the insertion of alien spores and inherit from programs based on nonAristotelian logic.

There are no pointers in Bogus, nor in this memo.

[lilkidbigmouth]

thanks for that but whats your point.

[creative_32X_mx]

What The ??????

Me no understand.

Alwells maybe next time.

Cheers

[Drakain Zeil]

Hehe, funny.