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November 23rd, 2007, 06:32 PM
#1
Osama bin Laden
I came across this and thought it might amuse:
Three blokes - a Canadian farmer, Osama bin Laden and an Aussie engineer
are all working together one day and they come across a lantern and a
Genie pops out of it. "I will give each of you one wish, which is three
wishes in total" says the Genie.
The Canadian says, "I am a farmer and my son will also farm. I want the
land to be forever fertile in Canada."
POOOOFF! With the blink of the Genie's eye, the land in Canada was
forever fertile for farming.
Osama bin Laden was amazed, so he said, "I want a wall around
Afghanistan, Israel, Palestine, Iraq and Iran so that no infidels,
Americans or Australians can come into our precious states."
POOOFF! Again, with the blink of the Genie's eye, there was a huge wall
around those countries.
The Aussie Engineer says, "I am very curious. Please tell me more about
this wall." The Genie explains, "Well, it's about 5000 feet high, 500
feet thick and completely surrounds the country. Nothing can get in or
out; it's virtually impenetrable."
The Aussie Engineer sits down, cracks a beer, smiles and says, "Fill it
with water".....
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November 24th, 2007, 05:41 AM
#2
Great joke.
Gave me a laugh for the day.
That would be a great TV commercial.
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November 25th, 2007, 11:23 AM
#3
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November 26th, 2007, 02:08 PM
#4
old but good:
still seen as we are bring up old jokes : A guy stuck in a huge traffic jam on a motorway and is wondering what is happening. suddenly someone knows on the windows and explains that a group of terrorists have taken Bush, Blair and Sarkozy hostage.
Driver "what do they want?"
person " they want 100 million dollars or they are going to douse them with petrol and set them alight. So a couple of other drivers said we would get a collection together."
Driver "How much is each person giving?"
Person " Normally about a gallon."
\"America is the only country that went from barbarism to decadence without civilization in between.\"
\"The reason we are so pleased to find other people\'s secrets is that it distracts public attention from our own.\"
Oscar Wilde(1854-1900)
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November 26th, 2007, 07:11 PM
#5
Howlarious MURACU!! LMAO!
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November 27th, 2007, 01:24 AM
#6
Beer it really is the Brain Food for us Aussies, it makes us smarter i swear.
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November 27th, 2007, 01:19 PM
#7
He-he-he... teabags
I agree... a bit (until it pokes my sleepy nodes). Here's the reason:
A herd of buffalo can move only as fast as the slowest buffalo, and when the herd is hunted, the slowest and weakest ones at the back are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular culling of the weakest members.
In much the same way the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, we all know, kills brain cells, but naturally it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first.
In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine.
That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers.
from this site: http://www.askmen.com/jokes/2007_oct/oct10.html
Cheers!
Si vis pacem, para bellum!
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