Okay, this thread is part discussion, part me asking for advice, and part gripe session.

My son (7) has lived with me since his dad and I separated when he was 2. He has always been able to see his dad whenever it was convenient for him. However, now he is in school, and in the divorce agreement, I have primary custody of him during the school year, with "reasonable" visitation to his dad(I live in FL, and his dad in NC). Now I have really tried to go out of my way to make sure that he sees his dad a lot...Christmas break, Spring break, and all summer vacation. He talks to his dad at least every 2-3 days when he is here, and we have a "daddy envelope" that we mail things once a week to him..school work, pictures he draws, CD's we make for him...whatever he wants to do.
Anyway, now he is at his dad's house, and his dad has been making him feel very guilty about not going to school there. He says that daddy misses him, and doesn't get to see him enough. He wants to stay there and go to school, but I don't know how he really feels, because I don't ever get to talk to him without his dad standing right there. I KNOW that I am the better parent for him to stay with to go to school, I'm a stay at home mom, I'm very involved in everything he does at school, and we play sports together, and generally have a great time...at dad's house, it's more of eat cereal for dinner, play video games and watch cartoons all day, and go to bed when you feel like it. I don't feel like there is any actual harm to him in being there, but I feel like I provide a much more stable environment for him.

My question I guess would be:
If you are a child of divorce...did one or both of your parents try to manipulate you? Did you live thru it to become a normal person? I'm really worried about the emotional effects this will have on my son.
If you have children, whether you are divorced from their other parent or not, would you give in? I wonder if I should let him do what he wants to, or do what I really really think is right.

Thanks for the time...I know this was long, and I tried to make it as concise as possible.

Deb