1. Your phone bill lists 1,987 household lines.
2. Your child tells you that the private interview with the Secret Service agent was for a social studies class essay.
3. You receive mail addressed to Phil E. Phreak.
4. The kid cheers Lex Luthor whenever a Superman movie runs on TV.
5. The CEO of a regional Bell operating company appears on your doorstep, sobbing uncontrollably and begging forgiveness.
6. You find a copy of Phrack magazine hidden under the underwear in your son's bedroom dresser. (The Playboy magazine is next to the handheld scanner, of course.)
7. The kid asks for a Novell Access Server for his birthday.
8. The little silver-colored wheel on your electric meter spins so fast it flies off, slices your neighbor's elm tree neatly in two and flattens a tire on a Chevy Monte Carlo three blocks away.
9. Your kids English teacher calls, sounding really curious, to ask why the kid selected the Oklahoma City phone directory for their monthly book report.
10. Your kid names Robert Morris Jr. as his "Most Admired American."