Well, it is 12:31 AM. October 2nd 2003. It has been exactly 1 year now that I have been a member of this site. I never thought I would be here this long when one year ago today I joined. I thought I would make afew posts, possibly meet some people into things like I am into, and then leave like I have many, many, many sites before this.

I usually join a site and make a few posts here and there, and then leave. I'm still here. It's October, which means something to me; For one thing, this marks the begining of cooler temps in my state. I don't like summer because I don't like the hot, humid, stormy weather, and well, that's what summer in Michigan is.

Also, this marks te begining for TV stations to start playing good things on TV. I like horror movies, which unless you are new to this site or never talked to me, you know already. Well, Halloween is also coming.

Being a HUGE Misfits fan, that also means more than watching horror movies on TV. It's special. Also, after October is November; The month I was born, so my Birthday is also coming up and I'll be 21 years old.

Also, after that is December, which means snow, Christmas/The birth of Jesus, and a new year. I'm Christian so it does mean more to me than presents and time off of school. And new years is always something for me.

Also, I was thinking about all I'v been through in the passed year, which is ALOT. I joined this site one year ago today. In the last year, I have had multiple GFs, Written 11 Bastard admin from Michigan stories, gotten new movies, had some great times, and also some bad ones.

I lost my Unckle that I grew up with. That was hard on me. I didn't take it very well. I also damn near had a nervouse break down realising things I have wong with me. I never thought about the fact that I have had tourrette's and OCD and ADD and Social anxiety disorder since I was a kid. I never thought about it untill I saw it on TV.

It bothered me too see people act it out. It also made me look into it, and scared the **** out of me. I was so depressed about it, I Prayed an asked God to help me out, and God did. I'm feeling much better now. It just bothered me badly to even think about it. I guess I never thought about it before so it didn't bother me, but I couldn't stop thinking about it and it was torture.

If I don't think about it, it doesn't bother me though. I'v also lost friends this year. My best friend moved away, far away, to the other side of the state. I havn't seen him in about 5 months now.

Most of my other friends are gone too. I made some new ones but you can't replace them. I also went through alot with some of my ex GFs. Some were them wanting me back and others were them starting **** with me.

I have really been through alot this year. Good and bad both. I also went through **** here on AO. People that were my friends stopped talking to me, people I didn't really know starting rumors about me, alot of bullshit they would NOT say to my face.

And yes I'm sure of that because I offered to pay for a plane ticket for one of them to come here and they never responded. Yes, I can actually get that angry over someone in another country that I'd pay the way for them to come here so they can't hide behind a keyboard.

I was thinking about all the things I have gone through in the last year and I grabbed my keyboard and started playing. I came up with a little melody that sounds like I feel. Maybe if people actually want to hear it I'll upload it to a web site after I record it. All it is, is a small piano sound right now. I'll add a bass line and guitar riff to it later on. And maybe a drum line.

Anyway, thanks to God, I am still here, and still ok. To the people who havn't talked **** behind my back; Thanks for being there and being an actual friend to me. To the people who hated me from day one; Thanks for having the balls to be honest. To the people who talked **** behind my back; **** you, from gore.

The Gore Father - October 2nd, 2003.