An old family favorite, from the un-official O'Dalaigh archives:

Seamus Finnegan decides he's leaving Ballymoore and moving to America to make his fortune. His mother is terribly concerned and asks Father Patrick to speak with him.

"So, Seamus. You're going to move off to America and find yer fortune, are ye? Well, let me tell you a story. Let me tell you of Jon Dun. He decided a few years back that he was moving to America to find his fortune. His poor mother cried and wept, begging him not to leave her, but he refused to be swayed, promising he'd write to her and send for her when he was a rich baron of New York; he was going to conquer the market and bring his mother to America to live in luxury with him.

But several years have passed, and no letters have come from Jon. Mrs. Dun has been miserable ever since, and to this day she rocks on her porch, moaning for her John to come home to her.

So you listen to me, Seamus Finnegan! If you go to America, you will write to your mother every week and promise not to break her heart. And if you see that Jon Dun, you march right up to him and tell him to do the proper thing and send his mum a letter!"

Seamus promises that he will do so, and heads to America. He spends several weeks looking for work with little success, but he writes his mother every Sunday. One day he is walking along Wallstreet and see's a large banking building with the sign Dun & Bradstreet.

"Och! That must be Jon's place!" Seamus walks right in, heads to the secretary's desk, and says rather bluntly "Ok, so where's Jon?!?"

"Excuse me sir?"

Seamus replies "Jon. This is his building, innit? Where's Jon?"

"Oh I see. Down the hall to your left, sir. 2nd door."

So Seamus walks down and enters the room, a men's restroom that, being form Ballymoore and never having been in a big fancy bank before, Seamus doesn't quite recognize. A gentlemen is finishing his business at a stall just as Seamus enters.

Seamus looks the man up and down, then demands rather forcefully "Are you Dun?!?"

"Uh...yeah" says the man somewhat nervously.

"Well damnit man, write to your mother!"

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Thank you, thank you very much. I'm here all week. Try the veal. :P