MICHAEL Buerk watching Phillipa Forrester cuddle a male astronomer for
warmth during BBC1's eclipse coverage remarked:
"They seem cold out there,
they're rubbing each other and he's come in his shorts."
HERE is Ken Brown commentating on golfer Nick Faldo and his caddie Fanny
Sunneson lining-up shots at the Scottish Open:
"Some weeks Nick likes to use
Fanny, other weeks he prefers to do it by himself."
ULRIKA Jonsson was a humble GMTV weathergirl talking about snowfall when she
revealed:
"I had a good eight inches last night."
LORRAINE Kelly on GMTV:
"This year's hairstyle is called a shag and our
resident stylist is here to give our model one."
MIKE Hallett discussing missed snooker shots on Sky Sports:
"Stephen
Hendry jumps on Steve Davis's misses every chance he gets."
DAVID Dickinson, talking about an antique door-knocker on Bargain Hunt,
said to expert Nigel Smith:
"You're a bit of a knockers man" "Yes," he
replied. "I've come across quite a few in my time."
HERE is Chris Tarrant discussing the first Millionaire winner Judith
Keppel on This Morning:
"She was practising fastest finger first by
herself in bed last night."
ROSS King discussing relays with champion runner Phil Redmond:
"Well Phil, tell
us about your amazing third leg."
BEATRICE Hillyer was discussing the availability of fresh water in Baghdad
when she informed TVam viewers:
"Just after the liberation, I was getting
it twice a day in my hotel room."
CRICKETER Neil Fairbrother hit a single during a Durham v Lancashire
match, inspiring Bobby Simpson to observe:
"With his lovely soft hands he
just tossed it off."
JAMES Allen interviewing Ralf Schumacher at a Grand Prix, asked:
"What
does it feel like being rammed up the backside by Barrichello?"
Steve Ryder covering the US Masters:
"Ballesteros felt much better today
after a 69."
STEVE Cram covering the men's 200 metres at the World Athletics
Championships:
"Pumping away, Marlon Devonish has got the Olympic champion
inside him."
CHAIN Letters host Allan Stewart was discussing a 6ft 5in contestant
called Richard when he told two women competitors:
"That's enough Dick for both
of you."
EXPERT David Batty was examining a bowl with a pineapple-shaped lid on
Antiques Roadshow when he exclaimed:
"This is the most magical, wonderful knob I
have ever seen."
CARENZA Lewis about finding food in the Middle Ages on Time Team Live
said:
"You'd eat beaver if you could get it."
Ooops...some funny comments
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