Windows '98 Source Code

[Joey_Batch_File]

Windows '98 Source Code
Author Unknown, Code reformatted by Alan Kemmer)
http://www.bastichlabz.org/~tigger/TechHumor/windows98code.txt

/*
TOP SECRET Microsoft(c)
Code Project: Chicago(tm)
Projected release-date: Summer 1994
*/

#include "win31.h"
#include "win95.h"
#include "evenmore.h"
#include "oldstuff.h"
#include "billrulz.h"
#define INSTALL = HARD

char make_prog_look_big[1600000];
void main()
{
while(!CRASHED)
{
display_copyright_message();
display_bill_rules_message();
do_nothing_loop();

if (first_time_installation)
{
make_50_megabyte_swapfile(); do_nothing_loop();
totally_screw_up_HPFS_file_system();
search_and_destroy_the_rest_of_OS/2(); hang_system();
}

write_something(anything);
display_copyright_message();
do_nothing_loop();
do_some_stuff();

if (still_not_crashed)
{
display_copyright_message();
do_nothing_loop();
basically_run_windows_3.1();
do_nothing_loop();
do_nothing_loop();
}
}

if (detect_cache())
disable_cache();

if (fast_cpu())
{
set_wait_states(lots);
set_mouse(speed, very_slow);
set_mouse(action, jumpy);
set_mouse(reaction, sometimes);
}

/* printf("Welcome to Windows 3.11"); */
/* printf("Welcome to Windows 95"); */
printf("Welcome to Windows 98");

if (system_ok())
crash(to_dos_prompt);
else
system_memory = open("a:\swp0001.swp", O_CREATE);

while(something)
{
sleep(5);
get_user_input();
sleep(5);
act_on_user_input();
sleep(5);
}

create_general_protection_fault();
}

[prodikal]

:rofl: it`s funy because i use win 98 im only reebooting every three hours now :) because of a reeformat

[ArmyOfOne]

hahhaha that's great.

[Fakeboy]

I like that.... alot

[toxic-ram]

Lol! That's a good one. But the sad thing is that it's almost all true. ;)

[Fakeboy]

I was looking over the threads and noticed this post is Negative, and this thread is even http://www.antionline.com/showthread.php?s=&threadid=232560 . This joke is alot better than the ones located on the link. I am assuming this is a revenge Negative, rather than a legit negative. Oh, well.

[alittlebitnumb]

I have no idea why this post is negative. The only thing I can think of it *could* be viewed as a "useless," "stupid," or "unessesary" post. I liked the humor, though, it could make a good screensaver. What kind of feedback are you getting Joey? I am kinda wondering myself man.

[Joey_Batch_File]

Originally posted here (http://www.AntiOnline.com/showthread.php?threadid=#post) by alittlebitnumb
What kind of feedback are you getting Joey? I am kinda wondering myself man.

I just got -30 points for posting the oldest joke in the book. The only reason I posted it, was because there was an awful lot of Win98 chit chat going on, and now that 98 support has been discontinued. I would post one last Win98 joke. I could see if I posted a Win 3.11, but I won't even attempt that. Hey thanx for the support guys. I guess some people have to even out their points, and others only think about theirself when they assign points. I can't read minds, and people are not specific with feedback....

[nobix]

Too bad we can't compare it to the really win 98 source code. = )

[B4D_S3CT0R]

Joey talk about the fart story from the other thread it was funnier than this cuz this is stupid you know that?

farting in elevators is funier than this stupid stuff hahahahaha http://www.antionline.com/showthread.php?threadid=232511

[alittlebitnumb]

Too bad we can't compare it to the really win 98 source code. = )

I have always wanted to see the source for the Windows series myself including a lot of other developers. However, I bet it is gigantic...

[Fakeboy]

Originally posted here (http://www.AntiOnline.com/showthread.php?threadid=#post) by Joey_Batch_File


I just got -30 points for posting the oldest joke in the book. The only reason I posted it, was because there was an awful lot of Win98 chit chat going on, and now that 98 support has been discontinued. I would post one last Win98 joke. I could see if I posted a Win 3.11, but I won't even attempt that. Hey thanx for the support guys. I guess some people have to even out their points, and others only think about theirself when they assign points. I can't read minds, and people are not specific with feedback....

I don't get that man. Your post goes from Negative to E. Positive, so if 1 person knocked you down 30 points, because this is an old joke, and everyone else is enjoying. I am going to have to say... you were right about others only thinking about their self when assigning points. It can't be too bad of a post if only one person had a problem with it. Well I would help you out with points, but I am grey also. I hope you get back up to 50 soon. I just checked my AP's and I got a grey from you not even 5 minutes ago. Did you get negged again?

[Joey_Batch_File]

Originally posted here (http://www.AntiOnline.com/showthread.php?threadid=#post) by Fakeboy
I got a grey from you not even 5 minutes ago. Did you get negged again?

I got negged for getting to many AP's for a stupid Joke. We'll just drop the subject.... Thanx

[Ouroboros]

Hell, it took me 2 years to work all of the conflicts and bugs out of W98 (which is what I use, along with RH7.3), not to mention adjusting caches and VM and etc., and have had absolutely no problems as of late. I can even use it as a server with no hangs or BS'sOD). Yet I long for W3.11...aaahhh...fully functional, natural DOS....
Anyways...good joke, no matter how many times I see it, and completely true.

Ouroboros

[Ruzhyo]

Now I think we know why Micro$oft will always be closed source. . . ;-)

[Fakeboy]

Originally posted here (http://www.AntiOnline.com/showthread.php?threadid=#post) by Joey_Batch_File
The only reason I posted it, was because there was an awful lot of Win98 chit chat going on, and now that 98 support has been discontinued. I would post one last Win98 joke. I could see if I posted a Win 3.11, but I won't even attempt that. Hey thanx for the support guys.

Looks like your still getting the support.... Good luck Bro!

[SirVentolin]

Funny yes...but I have gotten win98 to run perfectly for weeks on end with out having to turn off the machine....and the motherboard I was running it off was a pentium one with 168Mb ram (don't ask) which I paid 14 dollars for.... it just...didn't crash....I don't know what the rest of the free world is whining about but it never bothered me...

[SirVentolin]

argg this is messing up though....I never had to turn OFF the machine..sorry..uggg I LOTHE THIS COMPUTER

Sorry...I meant turn OFF the machine...but that computer is long dead....it stopped detcting that it had a ps/2 port....heh

...why did my computer post both of those?????? SEE WHY I HATE IT?

[er0k]

if (system_ok())
crash(to_dos_prompt);
else

thats just great. never seen an if..else that has that much effect. ::rofl::