Woooooo boy...I knew I was in for a ride in the first two seconds of reading:
As a part of our patriotic duty to this great nation of ours, we are currently installing a certain, classified module to our proprietary, closed-source web serving system
Heh.
Anyway...this thing is too good! Seriously, if anyone hasn't read it...DO IT! Print this out and highlight all the funny parts; it's better then a microsoft press conference!
"A computer hacker in my own House?!"
rotflmao
Now, just a word on all 10 of the serious points risen by this wonderful article.
1. Has your son asked you to change ISPs?
Yes, anyone who realizes AOL sucks MUST be an evil h4x0r!

2. Are you finding programs on your computer that you don't remember installing?
Oh my god! A power rangers screensaver! Little Billy is a hacker!
(Be sure to check out his list of evil hacker software, such as Flash)

3. Has your child asked for new hardware?
"Dad, can we get a cd-drive? Everyone uses them now."
"Timmy, you evil hacker! NO!"
Actually, this is a VERY funny part, be sure to check out his rant on the Evils of "Extra Memory" and "AMD"(Apparently a terrorist company)

4. Does your child read hacking manuals?
OK, this one makes a LITTLE sense, except for his bizarre little aside about his seventeen year old daughter sneaking out wearing, of all things, PERFUME!

5. How much time does your child spend using the computer each day?
Apparently spending more then half an hour on any given computer in one day means you are "DOSing" websites and being an evil hacker. It's apparently your civic duty to kick your kid off the comp...
"No Timmy, I don't care about your damn English project! It's been a full 35 minutes!"

6. Does your son use Quake?
I need say nothing but quote the article here...and point out the author apparently has the IQ OF A WET NOODLE
"It is a popular meeting place and training ground, where they discuss hacking and train in the use of various firearms"

7. Is your son becoming argumentative and surly in his social behaviour?
Is your kid going through puberty? HE'S AN EVIL HACKER! (Note - females are NEVER hackers)

8. Is your son obsessed with "Lunix"?
Yes, Lunix, the terrible system used to wreak worldwide havok.

9. Has your son radically changed his appearance
This one is good. Apparently ravers are just wannabe hackers. Since hackers often wear "bright, day-glo colors", "carry glowsticks" and "wear pacifiers". Damn you hackers going to your hacker parties and doing E and dancing around to evil hacker music!

10. Is your son struggling academically?
Yes...as we all know, the ones who do bad in school are the hackers. *cough, whistle, look around*

Well, there you have it. Apparently every teenager in america is an evil hacker...BEWARE!
-Grim